I get opened like this all the time but I just started accepting the invitation.
Don't use an opinion opener or anything like that.
Go straight to qualification /comfort , adding a little attraction material along the way.
Adam says in his qualification guide about using this to capatalize on her interst with qualification.
Jon said qualifcation- and set up a date.
show interst in her what you qualify her.
but don t show too much interst- even level ground.
FRANCO says:
she likes you you are laid back, ask her questions to make her invest into you. aka Qualification.
reward and complianace. Jon said theres no difference between these pickups it has to do if you get her out again,alot of girls are flakey or are busy. you have to follow up on them.
So Franco says gauge her if her bt is into slutty mode close her.forget logistics go somewhere to be alone and have sex.
----------------------------------------
Approaching can also happen when a woman gives an "approach invitation" (abbreviated "AI"), a favorable body language signal, like eye contact or a smile.
PUAs believe that reading signals like the woman touching her hair, laughing, (termed IOI – Indicators of Interest) and knowing when to "escalate" the interaction to more intimate levels when windows of opportunity arise are essential skills for having success of any nature. The timing of these escalations is thought to be critical because a missed window of opportunity due to tentativeness can serve to dampen attraction. Another thought on this is that it does not matter what a woman does (like touching her hair), as long as the woman is being friendly toward the PUA.
Alternately, a window can be playfully skirted or even ignored to build tension, providing emotional space in which people can feel comfortable and unpressured. To calibrate interest from a woman, one can ask the AIA question: "Am I Interested". If the woman is, the player can calibrate accordingly and escalate touching and logistics
-------------------------------------
Yes. AI. That's why I call this pre-approach method pAImAI. You are
essentially a male using a female tactic. A lot of men might do this
naturally, but the difference is in the conscious control of what's going on,
actually acting on the situation, paying attention for AIs and IOIs,
capitalizing, and having full confidence to not care if she knows you're
checking her out.
This is also the very frame which allows compliments to work VERY well versus
trying to compliment a chick out of the blue.
Why does this work so well? Because it is the accumulation of initial actions
taken by what most women perceive as a REAL MAN. It minimizes the importance
of your looks, status, and other external factors, and creates a display of
ultimate masculinity. You are a selective man of action.
------------------------------------------
what Im getting is not IOIs itself its called Appraoch invitation.or warm appraoch.
A warm approach is a blanket term used to refer to any approach that is not a cold approach on a complete stranger. Usually, this takes place during social circle game, where both the PUA and the girl have a mutual friend in common. That commonality is usually enough to break the ice, and make starting a conversation and a relationship with her a lot easier than if the PUA had just run into her in the street.
A warm approach can also be used to refer to when a pick up artist reopens a set that he already previously opened, and left on a positive note. For example, using the technique of short setting, a pick up artist may very quickly meet and talk to everyone in a venue. Even though the PUA is only able to give a brief introduction of himself in that time, just that little bit of a connection is usually enough to make the PUA’s next approach a warmer one.
PUAs also use the term “warm approach” to refer to easy approaches. In this context, a warm approach can mean approaching a girl who is throwing out heavy IOIs, or approaching someone in a situation where the pickup artist is heavily social proofed. A warm approach in these cases is an easy approach on someone who is at least somewhat interested, rather than an approach on a stranger who hasn’t shown the slightest bit of interest.
Usage:
This is a house party that my friend is throwing so there will be a lot of warm approaches
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magic bullets:
Before you open
Watch what you do before you open. Many women will notice you, consciously or subconsciously, before
you even approach them. Do things to create an impression that you are a social, successful, high-status
man.
Watch for Approach Invitations: Very little of what women do in social gatherings is random. When a group
of women stops in a specific place, there’s often a reason. And that reason is often a nearby man doing
some of the things listed in Before You Open Checklist on the previous page. They want you to approach
them. Similarly, a woman who makes repeated eye contact with you is likely inviting you to start a conversation
with her. In this situation, use a higher risk/reward opener like No Opener, Screening, or Direct,
since there is less need to try to fly “under the radar”.
Don’t let other men touch you without responding. Men invading other men’s personal space is
a sign of dominance. This is very attractive to women. A study last year showed that women are three
to four times more likely to seek to make eye contact with men (i.e., “approach invitations”, see Chapter
5) who express this sort of dominance over other men than they do with men who do not.
Good looks can also give you more approach invitations (see Chapter 5), and give you more freedom overall
to make mistakes. So you may as well do everything you can to improve them. We certainly do. But don’t
expect this to change your life.
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Get Plenty Of Women By Opening A Conversation On Approach Invitation
by Franco
This is probably the easiest way of doing pickup.
Opening a conversation with a woman on her approach invitation.
An approach invitation (AI) is something spontaneous and very often unconscious women do.
It implies the message: ”Please notice me, please talk to me.”
It is easy because all what you need to do is to slow down your pace, observe the environment and then open the conversation.
Approach invitations are:
- She looks at you and turns her head in the other direction rapidly.
- She smiles lightly to you, makes eye contact with you and then rapidly turns her head in the other direction.
- She walks close to you and if you change your place she is ”as for a case” again close to you.
- Playing nervously with her hand bag or other stuff she has in her hands
- Searching the content of her hand bag while close to you.
- Dropping stuff on the floor, while close to you.
- While walking she looks at you rapidly and then looks back.
- You walk by and she laughs louder while chatting with her girlfriends.
- She looks at her nails or checks the make up in her small mirror while you get close to her.
- Playing with her mobile when close to you, clearly without any intention of calling anyone.
What is crucial when you open in this way is the time between her approach invitation and the moment you open the conversation.
You have only a few seconds to open. If you wait too long you lost your chance.
Women are chased all the time by guys.
Realize that by doing this she is already making a big exception to what would be her average behavior in everyday life.
After a few seconds she will get rapidly into her ”I-am-not-a-slut” mode and you will lose your chance.
If you lose your chance because you are too slow to respond remember that it is always easier to open another woman who gives you an AI than persisting with the former.
Why women have their Ais last such a short time?
There are a few reasons:
- Other women can read their Ais much better than the average guy without experience with females. They would label her as a slut and ostracize her if she would do that ”too much.”
- Giving too overt Ais on the streets and other public venues would put women into danger: there are aggressive, dangerous men out there!
So she gives you her AI for a few seconds and then withdraws it.
That is your window of opportunity: it is a very fast, short message that she likes you and wants you to talk to her.
That is all what the average woman can do to break the social code.
Then it’s up to you.
Beware: some women nowadays began to approach men overtly in a very direct way. Those women are not the women of the best quality: they are the masculine dominant women who have learned to "match" male behavior.
In my book Getting the good girls it is described how to detect them fast and avoid them even faster.
You better approach the women who give you AIs. They are usually the best and most feminine ones! Better quality women.
When you see an AI quickly respond on it.
When she gives very subtle AIs better to approach her with some indirect opener.
Asking innocently a favor is something which works very well for me: it ”saves her face” after she gave the AI and makes her feel more comfortable.
For example:
Her: (looking at you and rapidly turning her head)
You: (slowing down and going to her side) ”Hey, I just came to town and looking for this restaurant, any idea where it could be?”
In the case her AI is more open, more direct you can get straight to the point:
Her: (smiling at you or laughing louder when you pass by)
You: Nice smile. You look just like my little sister. I bet you won the lottery today.
And then it is the time to engage her into a conversation.
One important thing: to notice Ais you need to slow down your pace. So walk slowly and be aware of the surroundings.
If you walk too fast you will not notice the Ais.
Awareness and speed are the crucial skills you need to start conversations
Another important thing is to be able to recognize the ”soft signs” of her horniness which I shared with you in the Manual of Seduction.
--------------------------------------------------------------
> Asked a HB I know about this and she said "I DO IT ALL THE TIME!!!!" -
> so chicks stalk guys as well (lol)
> ...
Yeah, I call this the "Approach Invitation" (AI), it's not really
"stalking". I mentioned a while back that I would post about it. I
guess I forgot to. Here it is.
First, to differentiate, there is a big difference between AI and
peacocking. One is for attracting the attention of a specific guy, the
other is to attract the attention of as many guys as possible.
When out doing PU with wings one day, I realized something that just
makes total sense and field-tested it many times since then. I
remembered something I heard once that chicks sometimes think they've
been "approaching" guys all day long and by the end of the day feel
totally rejected because none of those guys responded. The stupidity of
the situation (chick logic) is that what she thought was an approach,
was so far under the radar of what guys consider a "signal" or "sign"
that none of them have the nerve to approach (unless she's an HB and
runs into a PUA in which case she'll get approached, making that PUA
even more unique, and reaffirming the skills we're all trying to
learn). Chicks will do that kind of "approaching" consciously when
actively looking for a man, but a lot of the time they'll do the same
exact things UNCONSCIOUSLY when finding a man is a real desire but not
at the forefront of their mind.
OK, let me explain. Say all of a sudden men & women reversed roles and
men still had the same horniness but for some fucked up reason aren't
allowed to utter a word or be blatant or direct about how they meet &
attract women. Say you're a PUA and someone told you that you had to go
PU chicks (consciously or unconsciously) without initiating the
conversations, without initiating kino, without the ability to
*communicate* on those levels unless a chick strikes up a convo with you
first. Also, you're not allowed to go to bars or clubs to do PU because
there will be conflicts between AI and peacocking (confused signals -
very inefficient). What would you do? Shit, you're horny as hell,
you've got to do something! Well, first you would pick public places to
go that are bound to have lots of people which are constantly recycling,
a place where topics for conversation are plentiful, and places where
interesting and available chicks might go. Then, you would do subtle
things around them which would attempt to get their attention, just
enough to get an initial comment or reaction - your open door. Now you
know what it's like when chicks are on the "hunt" (again, consciously or
unconsciously). This is how chicks do their PU. It's a lot like how
AFCs try to do PU. They don't (LOL) although they think they're doing
all they can (which they aren't).
Now that's explained, roles are now back to what you know them to be...
You're in a bookstore and an HB walks up and stands near you and at that
moment starts making a fuss to dig through her huge sack called a
"purse" to dig out a scarf and keeps making a lot of commotion to put
the scarf on, fix her hair, whatever. That's an AI. The beauty of an
AI is that it *creates* your opener FOR you - you no longer have to
worry about WHAT to say to open with a chick. In that situation, all
you've got to say is: "Interesting scarf" or "That's a huge bag" or
"Hi". You are 10x more likely to get a positive response from an AI
situation than a cold approach using either a canned opener or coming up
with something interesting while initiating conversation. It could be
ANY number of things to get your attention that in most circumstances
are out of the norm of the normal pace of life. She decides to tie her
sneakers in front of you. She gives you EC and smiles. She asks people
around her stupid questions. She says something really dorky out loud
to her friend, easily overheard by you. She seems to stall in the areas
you're standing. She starts tapping her fingers on a surface near you.
She drops something near you, pretends to be interested in something
near you, ... YOU GET THE POINT!!
Here's where it gets better (related somewhat to Mystery's AWARE
state). When you go out to do PU, start off with a couple "warm up" PUs
where the outcome is totally meaningless to you. Yeah, the first couple
of the day tend to be tougher because you're "cold" and need to "warm
up". After those 2 are done, you will be in a different mental state, a
state where adrenaline is now circulating your system, you are more
aware of your surroundings, and you can pick out details and notice
things you didn't notice before. All of a sudden you start to SEE all
these AIs constantly flowing around you. Just pay attention. Then open
on the next AI you see from an HB that interests you. More adrenaline.
More awareness. Better PUs. Better responses. It snowballs. Once you
get on a roll for the day, you'll find yourself not only approaching
tons more women than you would have before, but most of them give you
good responses, and most of the time your openers are DECIDED FOR YOU!
Now, here's why I kept mentioning that a lot of the time chicks do this
unconsciously: If they unconsciously give you an AI, they are
unconsciously interested in you in some way but have not yet consciously
noticed you (which is still good!). When you open with their AI, and a
conversation "just happens", they will start seeing it like it was
"magic" or "meant to be". That comes from all the trashy romance novels
they read. You have to differentiate quickly between a conscious AI and
an unconscious one so that you can understand the perspective of the
chick who's giving it (actively being horny/excitable, unconsciously
being romance-oriented).
So, knowing this very small detail about chicks, and knowing all it
takes is just a couple initial "warm up" approaches at the beginning of
a PU session, you have the key to being able to approach dozens of HBs
per day with greater ease than approaching just a few without this
knowledge. It almost gets to the point where you forget what you are
doing consciously and can't remember (post-PU) how you even opened with
her, you will just remember saying SOMETHING which sparked a
conversation and eventually lead to a #/@ close. I believe that
"naturals" are constantly in this state which is why most of them can't
teach other guys how to do it. They KNOW how to do it but can't EXPLAIN
it.
Of course, none of this info really helps you with other skills
(carrying a convo, kino, pacing, leading, closing) but it DOES help you
approach a ton more HBs and not miss opportunities that surround you all
day long. Approaching a ton more HBs will help you build those other
skills faster. As my PUA friend Danny used to always say: "Repetition
builds speed and accuracy."
Rue wrote:
> Greetings. I am a bi chick spying on your newsgroup. It seems to me
> that these methods you speak of might work with girl-girl encounters.
> It seems worth a try in any case. I will report.
That would be interesting, yes.
> A note from the hetro side of my life. So many times I have been
> hanging out with a guy and thinking to myself "How much more obvious
> do I have to make it I want to get in your pants. Make a move, damn
> you". And they don't.
That's understandable, given thet most guys, even when they see a
"signal", scare themselves away from making a more commited move.
> One doesn't want to look to sluttish because
> that turns some people off.
We understand this about what goes on in a chick's mind as to why you
would not make the most forward move yourself (passiveness, ASD, etc.).
However, what I am particularly interested in is the gap of what men
consider an advancing move and what women consider an advancing move.
Meaning, can you give a few (clear) examples of how you felt you were
being direct and the guys didn't seemed to pick up on this? Also, when
you got to points like that, what went through your mind to try to be
more direct/blunt but you ended up holding back? or how about the times
you didn't hold back and what got you to make that move? Did it end up
working or did the guys still remain clueless and/or scared?
> I think guys miss thousands of
> opportunities to get laid just by not being aware of when a woman
> wants them.
Have you read any of my posts on AI (Approach Invitation)? This is very
related. It seems like the gap is bridged when a woman becomes just a
slight bit more noticable in her intent (rather than being completely
passive when the guy initiates out of the blue) and the man is at least
just a slight bit more aware of an AI. I've been recently studying a
means to propel a chick to provide an AI, watch for the AI, then follow
through after that initiation to move forward with the PU.
------------------------------
AI (Approach Invitation) info is not in the guide yet, but do a search for a
few posts by me sometime after May of '01. It's a combination of observation
which is enhanced by warm-up and leading that observation into simplified PU.
If you understand AI right, the number of potential approaches you can make
will increase 10x on any given day (assuming you actually go to places with
lots of HBs and lots of turnover - like downtown in a busy city or in a big
mall).
Beyond AI, I've also been working on something I've been calling pAImAI among
my wings. Pre-AI male AI. It's sort of a method of culling AIs from chicks,
essentially creating a situation for them where they MUST initiate an AI for
you if they are interested even in the smallest way.
Imagine walking into a large bookstore chock full of targets and picking out a
specific chick (the one you WANT) and doing stuff that will basically cause an
AI to get initiated by her, which basically creates the easiest and best opener
for her, handed to you on a silver platter. And it's all under-the-radar to
her. You get your opener. She thinks it's unique. Your meeting becomes
"chance"-centric and it becomes a lot easier to manage the PU.
-------------------------------------
If this works for you, I say stick with it. You might be able to enhance it by
having a wing hang back at a safe distance and somehow signal to you
non-verbally that she did, in fact, check you out. But I would say that's
unnecessary because that's coming from a frame of need that you want her to
check you out. I would say who cares. If you KNOW she realizes she's being
checked out yet stays put, that's all you need to know to presume high interest
on her end. I was just listening to the first 2 CDs from the Double Your
Dating audio course (review copy - will post a review soon) and was reminded of
something important David said a few times at the LA seminar - (paraphrased)
"Who cares what the chick's opinion of you is, you progress with what you want
regardless."
-------------------------------------
Right - one of my wings calls this "telegraphing [intent]." Sometimes it's bad
to telegraph intent - hovering, thinking nervously before approaching, etc.
But, if you telegraph in a CONFIDENT way, and she doesn't find a way to slip
away from you somehow before the approach, it's like she's giving an IOI right
there, effectively saying "approach me." it established a base of total
control for you because she's already accepted your presence, is receptive to
being approached, and not likely to be "surprised" when an opening is
initiated.
You guys out there reading this right now, PAY ATTENTION. This is better than
gold.
----------------------------------------------------
Yes, I do the same thing these days as well. I guess it could be called
"remote Gunwitch, pre-approach". For example, in a bookstore I was blatantly
checking out a hot/classy-dressed Chinese chick by herself while she was
looking at books in the law section. I was in a bookstore, yet not buying
books or even browsing. I was just leaning up against a small table at the end
of the aisle BLATANTLY checking her out for 2-3 minutes while she browsed books
before I approached. I felt like a panther ready to pounce. She didn't shy
away or move to a different aisle, so I walked up to her and STILL waited a
brief second for her to reciprocate EC and I said, "Hi, You look intent on
finding a certain book." Her: (smiling) "blah blah". My response (roughly)
was, "You know, I couldn't help noticing how intently you've been looking for
something in particular. I also was noticing that you have a very attractive
figure (looking at her from top to bottom)... actually, I couldn't take my eyes
off you." She took the complement well. I chatted with her for 2-3 minutes
(fluff), then took her to the coffee area in the bookstore, initiated kino
while at a small table (Maniac style), then extracted her from the bookstore to
grab Sushi and progress towards a same-day close. For the record, I didn't
actually close her the same day, but the newbs should pay attention to the
progression and how this played out in the context of my having total control
from the very beginning by gauging interest non-verbally and setting up a
pre-condition of acceptance and a platform for her to initiate her own AI (or
IOIs, whatever). I call this pre-conditioning pAImAI (pre-AI male AI)... I'll
be getting more into it while I write that e-book I keep talking about.
Anyway, some newbies might be saying "But wait, you COULD have gotten the same
result if you still approached quickly with a "Hi" regardless of getting EC
from her first, following the 3s rule, etc, etc. Sure, and I could win the
lottery today as well. And here's the thing I left out of the above situation:
I was hanging out with a couple of wings that day and one of them approached
her using that no-EC method - 3s, fast "Hi", and crashed even before the fluff
stage. She wasn't there to be *chatted up*, she was there to be *picked up*.
Or not. But that's the frame I used. Both of us had approached her solo while
the other guy wasn't around (both utilizing lone wolf context) and the other
guy is better looking than me. So, I would say this is a very scientific
example of why one method is superior to another, even though the weaker method
might work sometimes and the superior method might fail sometimes.
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