Environmental Energy and How It Relates To You

No, this is not a post about Greenpeace or global warming — not THAT kind of environmental energy.

This question has been coming up a lot lately, both with students and at lair talks. And it’s the question of environment. Typically, the guy will say one of the following:

“I usually do night game at clubs, but during the day a lot of women blow me out or flake on me.”
“I typically do day game, and when I go out at night girls ignore me or seem to find me boring.”

This is a REALLY common problem, and the reason is that the way you game changes based on WHERE you’re gaming. What usually happens is that guys learn to game in one setting — either day game or night game, and then once they get a little bit of experience, they branch out and try the other environments. But they don’t realize that it’s very different.

Think about it. During the day, your average woman is out walking around, not paying attention, pretty low energy, going about her day, probably out just to buy some milk and bread or something. And if you come flying in, grabbing her, yelling obscene jokes and teasing her about her shoes… it’s going to freak her out. Big time.

On the other hand, if you are in a loud night club, and you open a girl and immediately start trying to talk to her about where she’s from and what she likes to do… she’s going to get bored in about 3 seconds flat and walk away.

You need to match the energy of your environment.

In night clubs, it’s dark, it’s loud, it’s crazy, people are drunk, dancing and flirting left and right… so you need to be just as exciting and interesting to have a chance. The way I often describe club game to guys is, “you need to be the brightest and shiniest object in the room.” Not literally, but as far as your energy goes — you need to be more interesting and exciting than whatever she was doing before you opened her, or else you’re done.

Day game, on the contrary, is relaxed, chilled out and very, very, very casual. Anything you do that is too energetic during the day is going to shock her and make her feel weird. Imagine the energy level it takes to ask directions to Starbucks, that’s what the whole interaction should be like. Little to no touching, little to no teasing — just some smiling and some interesting conversation.

Clubs and day game are the two extremes… you’ll also find a lot of “in between” environments.

For instance, a lot of bars or lounges are going to be more casual than dance clubs, and dive bars and pubs are going to be even more casual. Opening a girl on the street at night will probably only be slightly more energetic than day game in many cases, and many social events and parties will fall into the same category.

Social circle situations (not counting parties) such as work, class, or meeting friends for lunch should be just as casual and low energy as day game if not moreso.

Calibrate your energy to the environment. Here are some principles to remember:

The Higher the Energy = the more kino, the more attraction game, the louder and more animated you should be, the harsher and edgier your humor, the better and more flamboyantly dressed.

The Lower the Energy = less kino, more comfort game, quieter, more relaxed and casual, little to no humor, dressed nicely but normally.

Hope this clears up a lot of issues for guys out there.