Question:
We get warned about oneitis. OTOH I've found that if I keep trying with girls a lot of type they will eventually open up. When do you know to quit?
I answer:
I remember I asked that same question to a daygame expert DOC HOLIDAY and he couldnt really describe to me other than a formula on how many times to call a girl is accetable quote...that being said.
when you are infront of her you can persist or plow verbally by not conveying neediness or clingyness by subcommunication.
verbally not being dismisive yet still talking to her and you are interested in her but not showing too desperate or predcitable.
oneiets and persistence is only a misdiagnosis when its after you met her and you cant seem to reach her to answer your calls and you are then trying to be persistent but in the wrong context when the"set is blown out" and she isnt interested yet you still text /call her leave messages and she has to verbally tell you that she isnt, then you feel bad about yourself a bit and you start to like the girl and you think as a newbie that by you not giving up you will change her mind....that is when oneitis and persistance in the wrong context seem to meet often enough.
""When women go wrong, men go right after them."" Mae West
this is cause you are wrongly investing in her more than she is. women like to chase things, in that aspect the are like a cat. you have to get them to chase you. if you are getting her investing then you can proceed, os she wants you to invest more then its less likely she will feel attraction for you.
Showing posts with label Doc holliday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Doc holliday. Show all posts
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Monday, June 14, 2010
Dead Phone Numbers
I get a lot of questions about what to do with dead phone numbers and how to bring them back to life.
First is when do you decide that a number is dead? Sinn came up with a great system for following up with numbers called phone freeze out. Basically it breaks down so that for each time you’ve called her and she doesn’t answer up or return your call you freeze her out for that many days before trying to call again.
Written out it looks like this–
Day 1 – Call
Day 2 – Freeze out
Day 3 – Call
Day 4 – Freeze out
Day 5 – Freeze out
Day 6 – Call
Day 7 – Freeze out
Day 8 – Freeze out
Day 9 – Freeze out
Day 10 – Call
Day 11 – Freeze out
Day 12 – Freeze out
Day 13 – Freeze out
Day 14 – Freeze out
Day 15 – Call
In theory this could go on forever but after two weeks (15 days) you can pretty much assume that the number is dead. I also like to leave a voicemail each time I call and she doesn’t answer. It’s best to keep them short and not mention the fact that she never returned your call. I usually just say “Hey, It’s Doc. Talk to you later.”
I used to leave leave messages of me singing a la Jeffy and his Air Supply voicemail… but then I kinda realized how weird and inconvenient it is to sing into someone’s voicemail.
Now I usually just send this text.
I wait until it’s about midnight or 1AM and send this fake booty call “Come over. Key is in the usual place.”
Usually they reply saying that you texted the wrong person or something similar and I always respond “Haha. oops. that wasn’t for you.” and call them the next day. Most of the time they pick up and will start grilling you about the booty call and who it was for. Just laugh it off, cut the thread, and stack into something else.
Saffron has great connections to parties and night life and he would just change the name of his dead numbers in his phone and every week or two send out tons of mass texts to the girls saying “Hey everyone. Big party at X bar tonight. Come out.”
Some nights a few girls would show up, other nights just one or none would come. Either way they’ll give you social proof and a lot of times will create jealously plot lines and all that shit.
Try both, see which you prefer, and make the most of your numbers.
First is when do you decide that a number is dead? Sinn came up with a great system for following up with numbers called phone freeze out. Basically it breaks down so that for each time you’ve called her and she doesn’t answer up or return your call you freeze her out for that many days before trying to call again.
Written out it looks like this–
Day 1 – Call
Day 2 – Freeze out
Day 3 – Call
Day 4 – Freeze out
Day 5 – Freeze out
Day 6 – Call
Day 7 – Freeze out
Day 8 – Freeze out
Day 9 – Freeze out
Day 10 – Call
Day 11 – Freeze out
Day 12 – Freeze out
Day 13 – Freeze out
Day 14 – Freeze out
Day 15 – Call
In theory this could go on forever but after two weeks (15 days) you can pretty much assume that the number is dead. I also like to leave a voicemail each time I call and she doesn’t answer. It’s best to keep them short and not mention the fact that she never returned your call. I usually just say “Hey, It’s Doc. Talk to you later.”
I used to leave leave messages of me singing a la Jeffy and his Air Supply voicemail… but then I kinda realized how weird and inconvenient it is to sing into someone’s voicemail.
Now I usually just send this text.
I wait until it’s about midnight or 1AM and send this fake booty call “Come over. Key is in the usual place.”
Usually they reply saying that you texted the wrong person or something similar and I always respond “Haha. oops. that wasn’t for you.” and call them the next day. Most of the time they pick up and will start grilling you about the booty call and who it was for. Just laugh it off, cut the thread, and stack into something else.
Saffron has great connections to parties and night life and he would just change the name of his dead numbers in his phone and every week or two send out tons of mass texts to the girls saying “Hey everyone. Big party at X bar tonight. Come out.”
Some nights a few girls would show up, other nights just one or none would come. Either way they’ll give you social proof and a lot of times will create jealously plot lines and all that shit.
Try both, see which you prefer, and make the most of your numbers.
Touching in Day Game
The biggest mistakes I see in students for day game is touching and their complete disregard for women’s personal space.
I’m going to cover touching today and tomorrow I’ll cover personal space.
Ready?
DO NOT TOUCH WOMEN DURING THE DAY
Simple right?
Seriously, just don’t touch them. It’s really creepy.
The extent of my touching during day game is when I shake their hand as I introduce myself.
I know this probably goes against every piece of community advice you’ve ever heard. But you have to look at what you’re trying to accomplish with day game and then look at why we escalate our touching at night.
Now at night our goal is to get a make out, fuck her in the bathroom, or bring her back to our place that night.
Touching plays a major role in all three of those things.
But the objective in day game is get a phone number that won’t flake. It’s not to get a make out in children’s section of the bookstore, it’s not to pull her to the food court bathroom, it’s to get a number that won’t flake and see her again. Preferably naked.
To get her number all you really need is comfort and a small amount of attraction. No touching required.
As soon as I stopped trying to escalate my touching in day game my number of blowouts dropped dramatically.
I’m going to cover personal space tomorrow.
I’m going to cover touching today and tomorrow I’ll cover personal space.
Ready?
DO NOT TOUCH WOMEN DURING THE DAY
Simple right?
Seriously, just don’t touch them. It’s really creepy.
The extent of my touching during day game is when I shake their hand as I introduce myself.
I know this probably goes against every piece of community advice you’ve ever heard. But you have to look at what you’re trying to accomplish with day game and then look at why we escalate our touching at night.
Now at night our goal is to get a make out, fuck her in the bathroom, or bring her back to our place that night.
Touching plays a major role in all three of those things.
But the objective in day game is get a phone number that won’t flake. It’s not to get a make out in children’s section of the bookstore, it’s not to pull her to the food court bathroom, it’s to get a number that won’t flake and see her again. Preferably naked.
To get her number all you really need is comfort and a small amount of attraction. No touching required.
As soon as I stopped trying to escalate my touching in day game my number of blowouts dropped dramatically.
I’m going to cover personal space tomorrow.
Monday, February 15, 2010
SAFFRON tribute posts
The 1 Hour Pull
saffron
I went to a meetup.com event tonight at a local bar. As is prone with these events, the attractiveness of girls isn't as high as the ones you'd find at the hot clubs on the weekends. But, the flipside is that the barrier to approach is much lower and the bitch shields are not on full blast. Also, the guys are mostly chodes.
But, sometimes you strike gold when you're least expecting it. When I walked in, I locked eyes with Victoria. She had silky long hair, a smile lingering with dimples, and a svelte body. As is always the case, there was some chode sitting right next to her, trying to talk her ear off, and I could tell by her body language that she was just being nice.
Realizing the energy of the venue, I came in with a very low key opener -- any flashy attraction material would be out of place.
Acting with no apologies, I walked over and said calmly,
"This is my first time here. I'm Saffron. "
"Hi, I'm Vanessa"
"Hi, I'm Chodey McChode."
I go straight into a topical transition about the venue and talk about how I recently just moved into town. She picked up the thread and we soon were talking about how she was from Japan.
"I hate Japan. Let me tell you why." -- I didn't disagree for the sake of disagreeing -- I just spoke my mind freely.
I went off, and she started arguing with me in a playful way. I verbally escalated and started talking about other commonalities that we had. We talked about our adventures, our goals, and things we liked to do for fun. We were deep into comfort.
About 30 minutes passed, and I mentioned an extraction excuse -- come check out this great restaurant near me. They serve some great late night food. She agreed and we left the venue.
We went to my house first to drop off her stuff -- this was key, because I knew that she would have to come back after we ate.
We headed out and I built more comfort at the restaurant--we talked about our childhoods, our drunk times, and our past relationships. We bounced backed to my place and went into my room. I looked at her silently, maintaining the silence for 10 seconds, then went in for the makeout.
It was a quick escalation, and then I threw her onto my bed. She started giving me LMR -- so I comforted her by telling her how much I valued her personality, how we were going to hang out tomorrow, and how it was her fault for turning me on so much.
Then I went right back into it. I escalated and clothes started flying off, but as if I was in some kind of terrible romantic comedy, her phone rings and her friend tells her that he's downstairs to pick her up. Apparently, this AFC was her personal driver and she texted him in the restaurant, expecting that she was heading home after the late night snack.
"Sorry. It's not going to happen tonight. You're going to have to wait until next time" she teased me.
"I wait for no one." I replied. "But, I still want to see you tomorrow, because you're a cool chick."
I walked her out and watched her get into the car.
Logistics are key to the SNL. If I had 10 more minutes of game time, the score might have ended up different, but you have to love the game because there are always new challenges to face.
Updated Aug 15 2008 2:59 PM
Posted Aug 15 2008 2:56 PM Internet Outage and Self-Improv
saffron
Updated Jul 9 2008 5:21 AM
Posted Jul 9 2008 5:18 AM Pick Up From the Female View
Saffron
Slightly racist, and mostly reflective of AFCs....just shows you how low the bar is and how you just need to take that small step to differentiate yourself from the norm.
And no, I don't just smile and open my eyes really big. I also say "hey baby, hey baby..."
Updated Jul 5 2008 6:47 PM
Posted Jul 3 2008 3:14 PM One Night Stands
Saffron
On a whim, I wikipedia'd One Night Stands. In the article, I found this snippet very, very interesting:
During sex females get such a strong dose of oxytocin that "when women think they can have sex and walk away just like guys do, they're having to suppress thousands of years of evolution that tells them to cuddle, stay in bed, and look forward to tomorrow. When they get up and walk out, they feel depressed and don't know why."[1] Researchers have found that women's feelings after one night stands are much more negative than men's. Feeling 'used' was the predominent negative emotion they felt the next morning and they also worried about their reputations and felt as if they had let themselves down. Professor Anne Campbell from Durham University said "What the women seemed to object to was not the briefness of the encounter but the fact that the man did not seem to appreciate her. The women thought this lack of gratitude implied that she did this with anybody."[2]
A lot of guys think that once they slept with a woman, their work is all over. For all the PUAs out there who wonder why they can't keep quality women around in their life, I'd take a second and ask yourself how you treat women AFTER sex. I'm a firm believer of the ethos "Leave Them Better Than When You Met Them." How do you do that? By appreciating her for something other than her physical appearance and her sexuality. There's nothing wrong with being direct and forward, but there will be a point in your life where you realize that sexuality is only the minimum requirement -- you are attracted to a woman because you appreciate who she is and what her personality is like.
Now that you appreciate her, the question becomes, how do you best show it? The Mystery Method talks a lot about qualification (a method where you elicit a girl's values and then reward her for having them). For me, it really is about authenticity. I simply show enthusiasm for traits that I cherish. And if she has traits that I don't respect, I will let her know that too. By doing both, you show her that you're not just supplicating and you also show her that you're a man of values. There's something to be said about being honest and straightforward in your interactions with women.
Ultimately, making a girl realize that you appreciate her BEFORE you sleep with her, will make the entire process easier, before and after sex. I view sex as a positive interaction, so if a girl walks away feeling negative about the interaction, I know that I seriously screwed up somewhere.
Updated Jun 30 2008 9:11 AM
Posted Jun 30 2008 9:05 AM Pitfalls of Pickup
Saffron
My good friend Toryn from the Boston Lair wrote one of the best posts I've read in a while and I had to post it here for you guys to read. Tons of value, so pull up some popcorn and plop yourself down and read this. I'll be honest, I've made some of the same mistakes too and struggle with my own ideals and the ideals that are commonly engrained in the community. Toryn is going to put up a blog soon, and I'll be sure to link him on my page, so you guys can get a daily dose of his wisdom.
Anyway, here it goes:
Learning pick-up has had so many positive effects on my life, including realizing new heights in my own self-confidence; understanding how to better interact in high-pressure social situations; and more and more understanding how to own my sexuality and desire around attractive women. And this is only a small bit of what I’ve learned since starting this process. As Groove noted in his Lair talk, this stuff can really change your life for the better if you allow it to do so.
All that being said, the more time I spend in the pick-up community, the more I become convinced that there are potentially serious pitfalls in each stage of learning these skills as well, which can do dangerous harm to your ability to form lasting and valuable relationships with women. The core questions that I've been grappling with recently, and that I try to address in this post, are these:
* Which aspects of learning pick-up are actually diminishing or degrading my ability to form a trusting and mutually-fulfilling relationship with a woman?
* How can I avoid these pitfalls so that I'm constantly moving forward in my social and emotional evolution?
I understand that not everyone will find this e-mail relevant right now. Some guys will be at stages in their emotional development where a lot of the things that I’m talking about below are just not on their radar screen yet. If that’s your case, that’s cool – I’d still recommend that you read on and think for a moment about the points that I’m trying to make here.
Pitfall #1: Objectifying Women
This one seems pretty obvious to me, so I’m not going to waste too much time talking about it. Yes, women are naturally the objects of our sexual desire, and yes, until you approach and get to know a new girl, she’s nothing more than a random attractive stranger. But when an entire community starts referring to people in code words such as HB8_Slut, the “target”, the “obstacle”, etc., you start to lose recognition of the fact that you’re talking about another human being.
Rating girls’ attractiveness on a scale has some value in terms of how you calibrate your approach and initial game material. Referring to girls as the “target” or “obstacle” has some value in terms of understanding the dynamics of a group set, especially when wings are involved. But in my opinion, once you’ve internalized these ideas into your behavior, get these labels out of your head as soon as possible, and save them for Field Reports or other times when you need them to discuss the mechanics of a set you ran. Don’t go through life thinking about every attractive girl you see as an HB# or as your “target.”
It’s been proven over and over again by psychological studies that one of the first steps in dehumanizing someone is to objectify them, to strip them in your mind of the qualities that would make you relate to them as another living, breathing person just like yourself. That girl who you’re interested in? At the end of the day she’s just a girl, with dreams, hopes, fears and ambitions just like you. Lose sight of that, and you lose part of what makes you human.
Pitfall #2: Focusing on “Padding Your Stats”
I went through a phase in the first few weeks after realizing my initial successes getting laid through game, and most guys who I’ve met in the community go through a similar phase. We have this feeling that can only be described as a sense of wonderment at our new powers with women. For those of us who weren’t born naturals, we’ve had years of frustration at screwing up with attractive women because we weren’t self-confident and socially experienced enough. Then pick-up skills give us that power, and we now feel that we’re more in control, that we’re no longer at the mercy of one beautiful girl’s opinion of us. It’s an intoxicating emotion, and for good reason.
You can see this intoxicating feeling reflected in guys’ posts on the forum. The first few Lay Reports that newer guys post up usually have this over-arching aura of “Oh my God, I can’t believe I actually accomplished this!” to them. During this stage when you’re realizing your first few successes, I think this feeling of wonderment is pretty much all positive. You’re rapidly gaining in self-confidence in an area that has plagued you for a while (you wouldn’t be in the community if it hadn’t), and you feel like a new man. All is good in the world.
Pretty soon however, the natural question arises of “What next?” Sure, there are always new skills to calibrate and internalize, new levels of inner game mastery to reach – but a lot of guys remain detached from what their true core goals are with learning all of this stuff. And when they become detached from their true core goals, they naturally fill that void with the goal of “Well, I want to bang as many hot girls as possible” or some variant (“have a threesome,” “fuck Asian twins”).
And so begins the danger of seeking external validation through sex. If you continue to neglect the other areas of your life which aren't together, you start to subconsciously look at getting laid as evidence that you are indeed the high-value, self-confident guy that you tell yourself you are. And when you think you’ve got a girl on the path to bed, but it doesn’t work out? Crash and burn inner game-wise my friends, and it hurts.
But here’s the thing: the guys I know who are truly secure in their own self-confidence and value aren’t overly concerned with whether they have ten women in the rotation at the same time or none. If they meet a girl who they’re attracted to, who they connect with and who they want to start a sexual relationship with, they do it. But if they go through a period where they aren’t meeting women who truly excite them, they don’t start to feel down or inferior because of it.
Again, this issue isn’t necessarily appropriate to every guy in the Lair right now, especially those guys who are younger. It very well may be that your goal at this stage of your life is to bang as many hot girls as possible with zero emotional connection, and that’s fine. It all comes down to whether your true core inner goals and desires and your outer behavior are in synch. Also, it’s good to understand that many guys’ life goals with women evolve over time, so it probably would be worthwhile to check in with yourself every few months to make sure that you’re still living according to your core goals.
Pitfall #3: Closing Yourself off to Emotion
You’ve done a ton of approaches, you’ve slept with some women, and now you’ve met one who you really connect with and who you like hanging out with. But every time that she tries to get you to open up to her emotionally, community dogma kicks back in. “Push-pull…control the frame…showing vulnerability is for chodes…one-itis is for pussies…an ‘alpha’ guy wouldn’t do this…”
A lot of the dogma that is good for breaking you free from your original fears approaching strange women in high-stress social situations can turn out to be crap when you relate it to relationships. Entropy is 1,000% correct when he says that relationships are a component of relating to women that on average the community has ass-backwards, and really doesn’t give nearly enough attention to. You think a girl is amazing? Tell her. She tells you about her deepest hopes and fears in life, and wants you to share yours with her as well? If you care about her, do it. Real men (edit: real PEOPLE) are not scared of their own emotions.
It all relates back to living with integrity and honesty. If you don’t care about a girl, you should be honest with her if she asks you. If you don’t care about her and you tell her that you really do, you’re a pussy. If you do have emotions for her, but you either tell her that you don’t or refuse to show them, you’re also a pussy.
But if you have emotions for a girl and you let yourself express them, that’s when the best moments in life can happen.
Pitfall #4: Making It All about the Sex
This is my new favorite, and it took me a while to identify and diagnose this in myself and in some of my Lair friends. Bear with me on this one, because I can’t seem to find a simple way to explain what I mean here.
You meet a girl, sleep with her, turn her into a regular thing, bond with her and genuinely care about her and her happiness in life, and things are going great. Then after a few months (it usually happens in this timeframe), the girl may come to you emotionally raw explaining that she’s starting to fall in love with you and just can’t do an open relationship any more, and that she wants to commit to you and to try being exclusive with each other.
But instead of committing, you get scared, and you begin thinking of reasons to tell her no. And what I’ve found both in myself and my friends is that more often than not we use the issue of sex as the primary reason to turn down exclusive relationships with really quality women. “I can’t be with just one girl, I want to consistently fuck new girls…she isn’t interested in having threesomes like we used to…I need variety in my sex life.” And on and on.
What I and the rest of guys who think this way are doing however is elevating sex above all of the other areas of compatibility that make good relationships with quality women really great. To an extent we’re ignoring whether the girl truly makes us happy, whether she challenges and excites us intellectually and emotionally, whether sharing with her feels like sharing with an old friend you’ve known forever.
A decision to not get exclusive with a girl based on sexual compatibility isn’t necessarily a bad thing or wrong in isolation. And per my comment above, it’s totally acceptable and understandable if a guy is not in the position in his life at this time where he wants a relationship at all. The problem has the potential to arise over time however, because the decisions you make in life form habits, and if you start consistently thinking about your relationships with women in this light, you could wind up making some very stupid choices.
I don’t mean to downplay sexual compatibility here either – it’s very important. But in my experience, after the first several months of hormone-driven craziness subside, the sexual health of a relationship exists because you and she stay connected on all other emotional and spiritual levels, not in spite of those connections.
The dirty secret that for some reason the community never talks about is that while it is absolutely true that attractive women are abundant, the number of attractive women in life with whom you will also feel a strong emotional, intellectual and spiritual connection as well are very few. Life being what it is, even if you sarge constantly, there will only be so many women who you are as excited about spending Sunday morning with as you were about fucking the previous Saturday night.
If finding a girl who will always be willing to have threesomes with you really is one of your core priorities in life, more power to you. But the girls who will be genuinely cool with this type of behavior are rare. It is the rule rather than the exception for a girl to want you to herself once she’s fallen in love with you. And more to the point, the girls who are cool with threesomes are not necessarily the ones who will satisfy you as well in the many other emotional, spiritual and intellectual areas that make a relationship lasting and great. And in the meantime, if you next all women who don’t fit the “threesome” category, you could very well wind up passing on women who really would have made you happier over the long run – all because you put sex above everything else.
saffron
I went to a meetup.com event tonight at a local bar. As is prone with these events, the attractiveness of girls isn't as high as the ones you'd find at the hot clubs on the weekends. But, the flipside is that the barrier to approach is much lower and the bitch shields are not on full blast. Also, the guys are mostly chodes.
But, sometimes you strike gold when you're least expecting it. When I walked in, I locked eyes with Victoria. She had silky long hair, a smile lingering with dimples, and a svelte body. As is always the case, there was some chode sitting right next to her, trying to talk her ear off, and I could tell by her body language that she was just being nice.
Realizing the energy of the venue, I came in with a very low key opener -- any flashy attraction material would be out of place.
Acting with no apologies, I walked over and said calmly,
"This is my first time here. I'm Saffron. "
"Hi, I'm Vanessa"
"Hi, I'm Chodey McChode."
I go straight into a topical transition about the venue and talk about how I recently just moved into town. She picked up the thread and we soon were talking about how she was from Japan.
"I hate Japan. Let me tell you why." -- I didn't disagree for the sake of disagreeing -- I just spoke my mind freely.
I went off, and she started arguing with me in a playful way. I verbally escalated and started talking about other commonalities that we had. We talked about our adventures, our goals, and things we liked to do for fun. We were deep into comfort.
About 30 minutes passed, and I mentioned an extraction excuse -- come check out this great restaurant near me. They serve some great late night food. She agreed and we left the venue.
We went to my house first to drop off her stuff -- this was key, because I knew that she would have to come back after we ate.
We headed out and I built more comfort at the restaurant--we talked about our childhoods, our drunk times, and our past relationships. We bounced backed to my place and went into my room. I looked at her silently, maintaining the silence for 10 seconds, then went in for the makeout.
It was a quick escalation, and then I threw her onto my bed. She started giving me LMR -- so I comforted her by telling her how much I valued her personality, how we were going to hang out tomorrow, and how it was her fault for turning me on so much.
Then I went right back into it. I escalated and clothes started flying off, but as if I was in some kind of terrible romantic comedy, her phone rings and her friend tells her that he's downstairs to pick her up. Apparently, this AFC was her personal driver and she texted him in the restaurant, expecting that she was heading home after the late night snack.
"Sorry. It's not going to happen tonight. You're going to have to wait until next time" she teased me.
"I wait for no one." I replied. "But, I still want to see you tomorrow, because you're a cool chick."
I walked her out and watched her get into the car.
Logistics are key to the SNL. If I had 10 more minutes of game time, the score might have ended up different, but you have to love the game because there are always new challenges to face.
Updated Aug 15 2008 2:59 PM
Posted Aug 15 2008 2:56 PM Internet Outage and Self-Improv
saffron
Updated Jul 9 2008 5:21 AM
Posted Jul 9 2008 5:18 AM Pick Up From the Female View
Saffron
Slightly racist, and mostly reflective of AFCs....just shows you how low the bar is and how you just need to take that small step to differentiate yourself from the norm.
And no, I don't just smile and open my eyes really big. I also say "hey baby, hey baby..."
Updated Jul 5 2008 6:47 PM
Posted Jul 3 2008 3:14 PM One Night Stands
Saffron
On a whim, I wikipedia'd One Night Stands. In the article, I found this snippet very, very interesting:
During sex females get such a strong dose of oxytocin that "when women think they can have sex and walk away just like guys do, they're having to suppress thousands of years of evolution that tells them to cuddle, stay in bed, and look forward to tomorrow. When they get up and walk out, they feel depressed and don't know why."[1] Researchers have found that women's feelings after one night stands are much more negative than men's. Feeling 'used' was the predominent negative emotion they felt the next morning and they also worried about their reputations and felt as if they had let themselves down. Professor Anne Campbell from Durham University said "What the women seemed to object to was not the briefness of the encounter but the fact that the man did not seem to appreciate her. The women thought this lack of gratitude implied that she did this with anybody."[2]
A lot of guys think that once they slept with a woman, their work is all over. For all the PUAs out there who wonder why they can't keep quality women around in their life, I'd take a second and ask yourself how you treat women AFTER sex. I'm a firm believer of the ethos "Leave Them Better Than When You Met Them." How do you do that? By appreciating her for something other than her physical appearance and her sexuality. There's nothing wrong with being direct and forward, but there will be a point in your life where you realize that sexuality is only the minimum requirement -- you are attracted to a woman because you appreciate who she is and what her personality is like.
Now that you appreciate her, the question becomes, how do you best show it? The Mystery Method talks a lot about qualification (a method where you elicit a girl's values and then reward her for having them). For me, it really is about authenticity. I simply show enthusiasm for traits that I cherish. And if she has traits that I don't respect, I will let her know that too. By doing both, you show her that you're not just supplicating and you also show her that you're a man of values. There's something to be said about being honest and straightforward in your interactions with women.
Ultimately, making a girl realize that you appreciate her BEFORE you sleep with her, will make the entire process easier, before and after sex. I view sex as a positive interaction, so if a girl walks away feeling negative about the interaction, I know that I seriously screwed up somewhere.
Updated Jun 30 2008 9:11 AM
Posted Jun 30 2008 9:05 AM Pitfalls of Pickup
Saffron
My good friend Toryn from the Boston Lair wrote one of the best posts I've read in a while and I had to post it here for you guys to read. Tons of value, so pull up some popcorn and plop yourself down and read this. I'll be honest, I've made some of the same mistakes too and struggle with my own ideals and the ideals that are commonly engrained in the community. Toryn is going to put up a blog soon, and I'll be sure to link him on my page, so you guys can get a daily dose of his wisdom.
Anyway, here it goes:
Learning pick-up has had so many positive effects on my life, including realizing new heights in my own self-confidence; understanding how to better interact in high-pressure social situations; and more and more understanding how to own my sexuality and desire around attractive women. And this is only a small bit of what I’ve learned since starting this process. As Groove noted in his Lair talk, this stuff can really change your life for the better if you allow it to do so.
All that being said, the more time I spend in the pick-up community, the more I become convinced that there are potentially serious pitfalls in each stage of learning these skills as well, which can do dangerous harm to your ability to form lasting and valuable relationships with women. The core questions that I've been grappling with recently, and that I try to address in this post, are these:
* Which aspects of learning pick-up are actually diminishing or degrading my ability to form a trusting and mutually-fulfilling relationship with a woman?
* How can I avoid these pitfalls so that I'm constantly moving forward in my social and emotional evolution?
I understand that not everyone will find this e-mail relevant right now. Some guys will be at stages in their emotional development where a lot of the things that I’m talking about below are just not on their radar screen yet. If that’s your case, that’s cool – I’d still recommend that you read on and think for a moment about the points that I’m trying to make here.
Pitfall #1: Objectifying Women
This one seems pretty obvious to me, so I’m not going to waste too much time talking about it. Yes, women are naturally the objects of our sexual desire, and yes, until you approach and get to know a new girl, she’s nothing more than a random attractive stranger. But when an entire community starts referring to people in code words such as HB8_Slut, the “target”, the “obstacle”, etc., you start to lose recognition of the fact that you’re talking about another human being.
Rating girls’ attractiveness on a scale has some value in terms of how you calibrate your approach and initial game material. Referring to girls as the “target” or “obstacle” has some value in terms of understanding the dynamics of a group set, especially when wings are involved. But in my opinion, once you’ve internalized these ideas into your behavior, get these labels out of your head as soon as possible, and save them for Field Reports or other times when you need them to discuss the mechanics of a set you ran. Don’t go through life thinking about every attractive girl you see as an HB# or as your “target.”
It’s been proven over and over again by psychological studies that one of the first steps in dehumanizing someone is to objectify them, to strip them in your mind of the qualities that would make you relate to them as another living, breathing person just like yourself. That girl who you’re interested in? At the end of the day she’s just a girl, with dreams, hopes, fears and ambitions just like you. Lose sight of that, and you lose part of what makes you human.
Pitfall #2: Focusing on “Padding Your Stats”
I went through a phase in the first few weeks after realizing my initial successes getting laid through game, and most guys who I’ve met in the community go through a similar phase. We have this feeling that can only be described as a sense of wonderment at our new powers with women. For those of us who weren’t born naturals, we’ve had years of frustration at screwing up with attractive women because we weren’t self-confident and socially experienced enough. Then pick-up skills give us that power, and we now feel that we’re more in control, that we’re no longer at the mercy of one beautiful girl’s opinion of us. It’s an intoxicating emotion, and for good reason.
You can see this intoxicating feeling reflected in guys’ posts on the forum. The first few Lay Reports that newer guys post up usually have this over-arching aura of “Oh my God, I can’t believe I actually accomplished this!” to them. During this stage when you’re realizing your first few successes, I think this feeling of wonderment is pretty much all positive. You’re rapidly gaining in self-confidence in an area that has plagued you for a while (you wouldn’t be in the community if it hadn’t), and you feel like a new man. All is good in the world.
Pretty soon however, the natural question arises of “What next?” Sure, there are always new skills to calibrate and internalize, new levels of inner game mastery to reach – but a lot of guys remain detached from what their true core goals are with learning all of this stuff. And when they become detached from their true core goals, they naturally fill that void with the goal of “Well, I want to bang as many hot girls as possible” or some variant (“have a threesome,” “fuck Asian twins”).
And so begins the danger of seeking external validation through sex. If you continue to neglect the other areas of your life which aren't together, you start to subconsciously look at getting laid as evidence that you are indeed the high-value, self-confident guy that you tell yourself you are. And when you think you’ve got a girl on the path to bed, but it doesn’t work out? Crash and burn inner game-wise my friends, and it hurts.
But here’s the thing: the guys I know who are truly secure in their own self-confidence and value aren’t overly concerned with whether they have ten women in the rotation at the same time or none. If they meet a girl who they’re attracted to, who they connect with and who they want to start a sexual relationship with, they do it. But if they go through a period where they aren’t meeting women who truly excite them, they don’t start to feel down or inferior because of it.
Again, this issue isn’t necessarily appropriate to every guy in the Lair right now, especially those guys who are younger. It very well may be that your goal at this stage of your life is to bang as many hot girls as possible with zero emotional connection, and that’s fine. It all comes down to whether your true core inner goals and desires and your outer behavior are in synch. Also, it’s good to understand that many guys’ life goals with women evolve over time, so it probably would be worthwhile to check in with yourself every few months to make sure that you’re still living according to your core goals.
Pitfall #3: Closing Yourself off to Emotion
You’ve done a ton of approaches, you’ve slept with some women, and now you’ve met one who you really connect with and who you like hanging out with. But every time that she tries to get you to open up to her emotionally, community dogma kicks back in. “Push-pull…control the frame…showing vulnerability is for chodes…one-itis is for pussies…an ‘alpha’ guy wouldn’t do this…”
A lot of the dogma that is good for breaking you free from your original fears approaching strange women in high-stress social situations can turn out to be crap when you relate it to relationships. Entropy is 1,000% correct when he says that relationships are a component of relating to women that on average the community has ass-backwards, and really doesn’t give nearly enough attention to. You think a girl is amazing? Tell her. She tells you about her deepest hopes and fears in life, and wants you to share yours with her as well? If you care about her, do it. Real men (edit: real PEOPLE) are not scared of their own emotions.
It all relates back to living with integrity and honesty. If you don’t care about a girl, you should be honest with her if she asks you. If you don’t care about her and you tell her that you really do, you’re a pussy. If you do have emotions for her, but you either tell her that you don’t or refuse to show them, you’re also a pussy.
But if you have emotions for a girl and you let yourself express them, that’s when the best moments in life can happen.
Pitfall #4: Making It All about the Sex
This is my new favorite, and it took me a while to identify and diagnose this in myself and in some of my Lair friends. Bear with me on this one, because I can’t seem to find a simple way to explain what I mean here.
You meet a girl, sleep with her, turn her into a regular thing, bond with her and genuinely care about her and her happiness in life, and things are going great. Then after a few months (it usually happens in this timeframe), the girl may come to you emotionally raw explaining that she’s starting to fall in love with you and just can’t do an open relationship any more, and that she wants to commit to you and to try being exclusive with each other.
But instead of committing, you get scared, and you begin thinking of reasons to tell her no. And what I’ve found both in myself and my friends is that more often than not we use the issue of sex as the primary reason to turn down exclusive relationships with really quality women. “I can’t be with just one girl, I want to consistently fuck new girls…she isn’t interested in having threesomes like we used to…I need variety in my sex life.” And on and on.
What I and the rest of guys who think this way are doing however is elevating sex above all of the other areas of compatibility that make good relationships with quality women really great. To an extent we’re ignoring whether the girl truly makes us happy, whether she challenges and excites us intellectually and emotionally, whether sharing with her feels like sharing with an old friend you’ve known forever.
A decision to not get exclusive with a girl based on sexual compatibility isn’t necessarily a bad thing or wrong in isolation. And per my comment above, it’s totally acceptable and understandable if a guy is not in the position in his life at this time where he wants a relationship at all. The problem has the potential to arise over time however, because the decisions you make in life form habits, and if you start consistently thinking about your relationships with women in this light, you could wind up making some very stupid choices.
I don’t mean to downplay sexual compatibility here either – it’s very important. But in my experience, after the first several months of hormone-driven craziness subside, the sexual health of a relationship exists because you and she stay connected on all other emotional and spiritual levels, not in spite of those connections.
The dirty secret that for some reason the community never talks about is that while it is absolutely true that attractive women are abundant, the number of attractive women in life with whom you will also feel a strong emotional, intellectual and spiritual connection as well are very few. Life being what it is, even if you sarge constantly, there will only be so many women who you are as excited about spending Sunday morning with as you were about fucking the previous Saturday night.
If finding a girl who will always be willing to have threesomes with you really is one of your core priorities in life, more power to you. But the girls who will be genuinely cool with this type of behavior are rare. It is the rule rather than the exception for a girl to want you to herself once she’s fallen in love with you. And more to the point, the girls who are cool with threesomes are not necessarily the ones who will satisfy you as well in the many other emotional, spiritual and intellectual areas that make a relationship lasting and great. And in the meantime, if you next all women who don’t fit the “threesome” category, you could very well wind up passing on women who really would have made you happier over the long run – all because you put sex above everything else.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
doc holliday classic post
I like Doc Holliday cause Ive worked with him...guy is genuine and real PUA.
I took 2 bc with them and worked with him....real eye opener.
So in honor to him and his help Im posting this.....
I also like Saffron and Entropy
Entropy seems to be top active PUAs out there, If you get a chance to work with him ...Do it.
I got success working with them...
drumroll please:
5 Questions With Pickup Artist Doc Holliday
Doc Holliday is the cofounder and executive coach of Practical Pickup. He is best known for his innovations on day game, first dates, and comfort game. He teaches personalized pickup coaching throughout North America. His thoughts can be found at www.dochollidaypua.com
What was the break through moment for you in regards to achieving massive success as a PUA?
DOC HOLLIDAY: I can think of two big ones, or really the catalyst and the following reaction. The catalyst was losing my virginity. I came into the community a suicidal virgin. Because of that I had some really weird and unhealthy views about sex. The biggest of which was that I honestly believed that pussy would solve all my problems… I quickly realized this wasn’t the case. Iosing my V card really brought about a change of focus for me. I started to develop my life in other ways and work through the issues that had led to my depression and attempted suicide. It showed me that pussy wasn’t the magic pill I had hoped it was. That realization forced me to accept the fact that I had to fix myself before I could ever hope to be happy with my life or be truly successful with women. Women will always be able to enhance your life but they can never define it.
What do you think the secret is for same night lays?
DOC HOLLIDAY: Logistics and comfort. If you’re going out and specifically trying to work on same night lays then you need to screen for logistics within the first ten minutes of conversation. Questions like “How did you get here?” “What’s on the agenda for tonight?” “Doing anything fun tomorrow?” etc. If a girl is the designated driver for her friends I don’t care how good your game is you’re not gonna pull her out of there.
Almost everyone in the community doesn’t focus on comfort enough. Most of the guys I meet think that sharing themselves is the equivalent to handing a woman their resume’, I went to school here, I grew up there, I like snowboarding, I go twice a month, etc. All they’re doing is telling the woman the “what” about their lives. What they should be focusing on is the “why.” For example a guy saying he likes snowboarding is the “what” but if elaborates and explains the “why” he’s going to build a much stronger connection with the woman. The why could be “You know, my favorite thing to do in the world is to go snowboarding. There’s just something about it, the feeling I get in my stomach as I go up the ski lift, that moment right before I’m about to go down, just looking down over the ledge where the adrenaline is just waiting to be released, and finally when I’m going down it’s just me and the board, my mind is completely blank except for what I’m going to do next. Even as a kid, I always loved the winter because I knew my older brother would take me to a mountain on our winter break.” I’ve never actually been snowboarding before.
Once you start to open up like this to women they’re going to open up back to you. You actually get to see her real personality and who she is as a person. A lot of guy are going to think this sounds like some AFC LJBF bullshit but when a woman says to you that you understand her better than her ex boyfriend of three years and you met her 3 hours ago you’re getting laid. No LMR, no friends dragging her away, just great sex.
Who are you mentors and why?
DOC HOLLIDAY: Within the community my greatest mentor is Sinn. I lost my virginity the same night I heard him present at a seminar. In my opinion he’s the best coach in the community, he’s worked with more students that anyone else, and he’s personally dealt with almost all the issues students go through. Personally experiencing and dealing with an issue gives you much better insight into the issue. He’s also always been brutally honest with me about what I needed to do to fix my game. It’s hard to find someone like that.
Outside of the community I’ve got to say my mother. She always has been and always will be the most important person in my life. I don’t have much family other than her so she has to fill a lot of the roles that other family remembers would normally cover, she did a good job.
Any tips for guys looking to improve their inner game?
DOC HOLLIDAY:Â Inner game is a different journey for everyone and I can only speak for myself. Personally reading literature has helped me understand and reflect on myself better than anything else I’ve found so far. To be specific John Steinbeck’s East of Eden changed my life more than any other book I’ve ever read. Guys need to realize that inner game is a process that affects every part of your life. It’s a personal journey that you’re never done with, all you can do is to try and enjoy the ride.
What is your favorite outfit to hit a bar or club in?
DOC HOLLIDAY:Â I’m easy, usually I got out in a pair of Diesel Jeans, a Johnny Cupcakes tee shirt, and cowboy boots. I have a lot of tattoos and body piercings but other than that I don’t peacock. Dressing crazy and peacocking is great when you’re just starting out because of the attention it gives you and because of the random girls that decide they like sleeping with guys who wear eye shadow and New Rocks. But you get a decent level of success I think it’s better to find a style that’s congruent and unique to you… then you can meet the girls who like to sleep with guys who wear tee shirts with cupcakes on them
I took 2 bc with them and worked with him....real eye opener.
So in honor to him and his help Im posting this.....
I also like Saffron and Entropy
Entropy seems to be top active PUAs out there, If you get a chance to work with him ...Do it.
I got success working with them...
drumroll please:
5 Questions With Pickup Artist Doc Holliday
Doc Holliday is the cofounder and executive coach of Practical Pickup. He is best known for his innovations on day game, first dates, and comfort game. He teaches personalized pickup coaching throughout North America. His thoughts can be found at www.dochollidaypua.com
What was the break through moment for you in regards to achieving massive success as a PUA?
DOC HOLLIDAY: I can think of two big ones, or really the catalyst and the following reaction. The catalyst was losing my virginity. I came into the community a suicidal virgin. Because of that I had some really weird and unhealthy views about sex. The biggest of which was that I honestly believed that pussy would solve all my problems… I quickly realized this wasn’t the case. Iosing my V card really brought about a change of focus for me. I started to develop my life in other ways and work through the issues that had led to my depression and attempted suicide. It showed me that pussy wasn’t the magic pill I had hoped it was. That realization forced me to accept the fact that I had to fix myself before I could ever hope to be happy with my life or be truly successful with women. Women will always be able to enhance your life but they can never define it.
What do you think the secret is for same night lays?
DOC HOLLIDAY: Logistics and comfort. If you’re going out and specifically trying to work on same night lays then you need to screen for logistics within the first ten minutes of conversation. Questions like “How did you get here?” “What’s on the agenda for tonight?” “Doing anything fun tomorrow?” etc. If a girl is the designated driver for her friends I don’t care how good your game is you’re not gonna pull her out of there.
Almost everyone in the community doesn’t focus on comfort enough. Most of the guys I meet think that sharing themselves is the equivalent to handing a woman their resume’, I went to school here, I grew up there, I like snowboarding, I go twice a month, etc. All they’re doing is telling the woman the “what” about their lives. What they should be focusing on is the “why.” For example a guy saying he likes snowboarding is the “what” but if elaborates and explains the “why” he’s going to build a much stronger connection with the woman. The why could be “You know, my favorite thing to do in the world is to go snowboarding. There’s just something about it, the feeling I get in my stomach as I go up the ski lift, that moment right before I’m about to go down, just looking down over the ledge where the adrenaline is just waiting to be released, and finally when I’m going down it’s just me and the board, my mind is completely blank except for what I’m going to do next. Even as a kid, I always loved the winter because I knew my older brother would take me to a mountain on our winter break.” I’ve never actually been snowboarding before.
Once you start to open up like this to women they’re going to open up back to you. You actually get to see her real personality and who she is as a person. A lot of guy are going to think this sounds like some AFC LJBF bullshit but when a woman says to you that you understand her better than her ex boyfriend of three years and you met her 3 hours ago you’re getting laid. No LMR, no friends dragging her away, just great sex.
Who are you mentors and why?
DOC HOLLIDAY: Within the community my greatest mentor is Sinn. I lost my virginity the same night I heard him present at a seminar. In my opinion he’s the best coach in the community, he’s worked with more students that anyone else, and he’s personally dealt with almost all the issues students go through. Personally experiencing and dealing with an issue gives you much better insight into the issue. He’s also always been brutally honest with me about what I needed to do to fix my game. It’s hard to find someone like that.
Outside of the community I’ve got to say my mother. She always has been and always will be the most important person in my life. I don’t have much family other than her so she has to fill a lot of the roles that other family remembers would normally cover, she did a good job.
Any tips for guys looking to improve their inner game?
DOC HOLLIDAY:Â Inner game is a different journey for everyone and I can only speak for myself. Personally reading literature has helped me understand and reflect on myself better than anything else I’ve found so far. To be specific John Steinbeck’s East of Eden changed my life more than any other book I’ve ever read. Guys need to realize that inner game is a process that affects every part of your life. It’s a personal journey that you’re never done with, all you can do is to try and enjoy the ride.
What is your favorite outfit to hit a bar or club in?
DOC HOLLIDAY:Â I’m easy, usually I got out in a pair of Diesel Jeans, a Johnny Cupcakes tee shirt, and cowboy boots. I have a lot of tattoos and body piercings but other than that I don’t peacock. Dressing crazy and peacocking is great when you’re just starting out because of the attention it gives you and because of the random girls that decide they like sleeping with guys who wear eye shadow and New Rocks. But you get a decent level of success I think it’s better to find a style that’s congruent and unique to you… then you can meet the girls who like to sleep with guys who wear tee shirts with cupcakes on them
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Saffron : DOUBLE SNL LRSNL LR Vegas
Download MP3] : Vegas Bathroom Pull + Stripper Pull w/ Pics!
Saffron, ABCs of Attraction Intern Coach in Training breaks down what is possible in Las Vegas using the ABCs of Attraction.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
He is one of the guys that blew me away when I met him...
he was working with Practical Pickup with Doc Holliday and Entropy
he retired but I communicate with him once in awhile
the advice he would give me after I met with him was just awesome
even till this day..I think he is top 3 PUA's
this is one of the LR that made me want to go to Boston and meet these guys...
Saffron, Doc Holliday and Entropy
I met game girl which I tottally fell for ... anyways
back to this LR which is a classic....
Or read the detailed field report originally written on Saffron's blog below:
Two girls in one night is always a good night. I was in Vegas last week Approach Coaching for ABCs of Attraction. I spent the majority of the night winging for students and pulling girls back to our VIP section. The picture below is a 2-set of the hottest girls in the venue that I had to hand over to the students. Ah, the joys of being an instructor. One of the students ended up making out with one of the girls while the other #closed. I'm proud of my young padawans.
After 1 AM, the Asian Playboy comes over to me and says, "You have 1 hour to pull." I'm always a challenge whore so I ran out of the VIP section and started running my standard dance floor game. At this point of the night, my social proof was through the roof because I led about 10 different groups of HBs back to our table.
I run lazy game, so I opened the closest attractive set near our booth. I use my Dance Floor Direct Opener and its an instant hook. The girl pulls me in. She grinds on me. I start my dance floor escalation routine. I execute a Fatality and a Lower Back Pain. She's going nuts. At this point there is no verbal game, its just physical escalation fractionated with BL takeaways and then my patented head rush kino pull. I enter my Sexual Eye Contact routine, which puts her through the roof.
This girl is ready to go. I pull her back into the VIP section so I can lower her BT. APB taught me that if you raise a girl's BT too much too soon, her entire state collapses during any kind of lull and she enters into buyers' remorse. I refused to let that happen that night. I enter into mini-comfort loops, run my cold read sex routine and stack into my adventurous sex DHVs. I pull my whisper move and enter into a heavy non-needy frame.
She straddles me.
HBBathroom: "Come closer. I'm going to do something crazy to you."
Me: [enters non-verbal Abundance Routine – something I've learned from sarging HB10s]
HBBathroom: [goes crazy] What are you doing? Look AT ME. You can't handle this.
Me: Who said I was going to handle anything?
HBBathroom: You're going to LOVE it. [tries to start kissing me. Licks my neck. Grabs my crotch]
Me: Shut up. Let's go.
I pull her out of the VIP. She pulls me into the bar and buys me a beer (I didn't even ask for one). We down it. I remain reticent. I let her chase. She starts grinding on me hard again. I don't mind it since she has this nice big ass and knows how to work it. I realize that I only have 30 minutes left to complete the 1 hour challenge. I command her to stop and pull her out of the club.
We're in the cab making out. I tell the cab driver my hotel. She sees her hotel in the distance and realizes that she left the club without her friend. She starts freaking out since they're leaving in less than 6 hours to fly back home and tells the driver to reroute to her hotel. FUCK.
We get to her hotel and she pulls me out of the cab. We're making out in the lobby now. She tells me that her phone is dead and she just needs to check if her friend is OK. We find her friend, they do the annoying "I haven't seen you in forever" routine and then her friend decides to try and cockblock me. HAH. I pull out the anti-cockblock shields and run the befriender routine. We're now all in a high energy state and grab a few shots.
CB tells me, "You're not getting laid tonight. Sorry, buddy, but my mom and dad are sleeping upstairs and I'm not going back to your hotel to have a threesome with you, because we're leaving in a couple of hours." (she's pretty drunk at this point).
I whisper into HBBathroom's ear, "This is your last night here. You can either sit here and talk to your friend like you do every night at home, or you can choose to have an amazing experience with me. Ditch your friend." HBbathroom turns to me and checks me for any signs of weakness. None. A couple of minutes later they run into the bathroom for some girl time. She comes out and freaks out. "OMG, I lost my cell phone." The CB starts freaking out and runs off to look for it at the bar.
HBBathroom turns to me and says "sike. I have it right here." Then she pulls me into the women's bathroom, strips my pants off and starts going down on me. At this point I have about 5 minutes left to my 1 hour challenge, so I pick her up, finger bang her, and then strip her naked. I bend her over the toilet and we go at it. Simultaneously, I whip out my iPhone and try to take a few money shots, but alas, there was piss poor lighting.
We wrap up and head back out. She buys me a couple more shots and then we exchange information.
--------- Part 2: Stripper Pull
I got into the cab feeling pretty satisfied. I plowed through some fucked up logistics and got my first ever bathroom pull. But, I wasn't going to rest on my laurels and the night was still young (3:00 AM) so I told the driver to drive me to the after hours club. All the strippers and hired guns go to this club once they get off shift, so I was looking forward to a good night.
I show up at the club solo in a post-sex glow. I could still smell the first girl on me. I look around to see if I could make any automatic wings. Most of the guys are rolling through in groups and they look like the bottle-buying type. I move on into the club and its this cavernous underground bar with four separate rooms. At this point, I'm in a pretty low state, since having sex kills my sarge drive for at least 24 hours.
I tell myself, fuck it, KOP: "keep on plowing." The club is packed with HB9s and HB10s. I can obviously tell that most of the girls are locals and most of them are strippers and hired guns. Girls are walking around in their work outfits, wearing bikinis and cut off shorts and ripped tank tops. Titties everywhere. I befriend a few sets and run indirect game for a while. I don't get blown out, but I'm also not deeply hooking any one set. I realize that I needed to run some HB10/ADD Party Girl game. I scan the bar and find my target – HBStripper.
I run my Balls to the Walls (BTW) Direct Opener and I see her instantly hook. I tease her a little then dominate the frame. I run my standard High Value Dancing routine and pull her on to the dance floor. At this point she breaks out her stripper moves. She pulls me onto a sofa and gives me a lap dance. She then pulls me back onto the dance floor and we become the center of attention. The entire room is looking at us grinding the shit out of each other. I pull out my head rush kino pull and my Sexual EC Routine. She's loving it.
I stop and control myself and reenter my Abundance Routine. She tries to pull me back into her and tries to qualify herself again through dancing. I don't bite. We pull away to the bar and she starts trying to kiss me. I dodge the kisses and pull away. We banter for a little bit and she starts grinding on me again. What an ADD stripper.
Now, what happens next I think, is key to the interaction. I know at this point she physically wants to sleep with me, but she isn't emotionally sure, so she starts testing me. She starts grinding on another guy who's sitting down in front of us. I sit back and watch and then open up a girl next to me. The stripper gets jealous and comes back to cockblock. I reshift my attention on her and then she tells me "I have to go for a second."
I stop and think to myself – if I let her leave, I may not see her again, since we're in the VIP section and its hard to get back in. But, if I don't let her go, I lose my frame and my dominance. So, I shrug and push her off. She leaves. I open up a few other sets and now due to my high social proof, girls are hooking much more easily. I get bored and realize none of the girls are as hot as HBStripper so after a half hour I eject. I find HBStripper near the exit talking to one of her guy friends. He's a rich chode, probably a customer, and has his hands all over her. I walk up to her, turn her around, and start making out with her. The chode just stands there with his dick in his hands.
I pull away first. HBStripper comes up for air and asks "What's that for?" I say, "that's for making me wait. Do it again and I'm going to spank you." (Spank) *credit to BradP.
I lean back against the bar and re-enter my non-needy frame. She starts grinding on me and she shares her drink with me. I'm getting bored and its now getting close to 6 am, so I run my ejection routine. HBStripper stares into my eyes for any incongruence and then gives me verbal LMR.
"Irrelevant." (Credit: Jeffy) "Let's Go."
We get her coat and exit the club. The sun is rising as we're making out in the back seat of the taxi. Déjà vu. We show up at our hotel and there's no LMR, since I already took care of it at the club. She really blew my mind. Well that, and some other parts of my body. Here are assorted pictures from my adventures:
Download the Audio Lay Report with Commentery's by Asian Playboy: http://www.abcofattraction.com/media/audio/saffrondoublelr.mp3
and visit Saffron's personal blog:
Saffron, ABCs of Attraction Intern Coach in Training breaks down what is possible in Las Vegas using the ABCs of Attraction.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
He is one of the guys that blew me away when I met him...
he was working with Practical Pickup with Doc Holliday and Entropy
he retired but I communicate with him once in awhile
the advice he would give me after I met with him was just awesome
even till this day..I think he is top 3 PUA's
this is one of the LR that made me want to go to Boston and meet these guys...
Saffron, Doc Holliday and Entropy
I met game girl which I tottally fell for ... anyways
back to this LR which is a classic....
Or read the detailed field report originally written on Saffron's blog below:
Two girls in one night is always a good night. I was in Vegas last week Approach Coaching for ABCs of Attraction. I spent the majority of the night winging for students and pulling girls back to our VIP section. The picture below is a 2-set of the hottest girls in the venue that I had to hand over to the students. Ah, the joys of being an instructor. One of the students ended up making out with one of the girls while the other #closed. I'm proud of my young padawans.
After 1 AM, the Asian Playboy comes over to me and says, "You have 1 hour to pull." I'm always a challenge whore so I ran out of the VIP section and started running my standard dance floor game. At this point of the night, my social proof was through the roof because I led about 10 different groups of HBs back to our table.
I run lazy game, so I opened the closest attractive set near our booth. I use my Dance Floor Direct Opener and its an instant hook. The girl pulls me in. She grinds on me. I start my dance floor escalation routine. I execute a Fatality and a Lower Back Pain. She's going nuts. At this point there is no verbal game, its just physical escalation fractionated with BL takeaways and then my patented head rush kino pull. I enter my Sexual Eye Contact routine, which puts her through the roof.
This girl is ready to go. I pull her back into the VIP section so I can lower her BT. APB taught me that if you raise a girl's BT too much too soon, her entire state collapses during any kind of lull and she enters into buyers' remorse. I refused to let that happen that night. I enter into mini-comfort loops, run my cold read sex routine and stack into my adventurous sex DHVs. I pull my whisper move and enter into a heavy non-needy frame.
She straddles me.
HBBathroom: "Come closer. I'm going to do something crazy to you."
Me: [enters non-verbal Abundance Routine – something I've learned from sarging HB10s]
HBBathroom: [goes crazy] What are you doing? Look AT ME. You can't handle this.
Me: Who said I was going to handle anything?
HBBathroom: You're going to LOVE it. [tries to start kissing me. Licks my neck. Grabs my crotch]
Me: Shut up. Let's go.
I pull her out of the VIP. She pulls me into the bar and buys me a beer (I didn't even ask for one). We down it. I remain reticent. I let her chase. She starts grinding on me hard again. I don't mind it since she has this nice big ass and knows how to work it. I realize that I only have 30 minutes left to complete the 1 hour challenge. I command her to stop and pull her out of the club.
We're in the cab making out. I tell the cab driver my hotel. She sees her hotel in the distance and realizes that she left the club without her friend. She starts freaking out since they're leaving in less than 6 hours to fly back home and tells the driver to reroute to her hotel. FUCK.
We get to her hotel and she pulls me out of the cab. We're making out in the lobby now. She tells me that her phone is dead and she just needs to check if her friend is OK. We find her friend, they do the annoying "I haven't seen you in forever" routine and then her friend decides to try and cockblock me. HAH. I pull out the anti-cockblock shields and run the befriender routine. We're now all in a high energy state and grab a few shots.
CB tells me, "You're not getting laid tonight. Sorry, buddy, but my mom and dad are sleeping upstairs and I'm not going back to your hotel to have a threesome with you, because we're leaving in a couple of hours." (she's pretty drunk at this point).
I whisper into HBBathroom's ear, "This is your last night here. You can either sit here and talk to your friend like you do every night at home, or you can choose to have an amazing experience with me. Ditch your friend." HBbathroom turns to me and checks me for any signs of weakness. None. A couple of minutes later they run into the bathroom for some girl time. She comes out and freaks out. "OMG, I lost my cell phone." The CB starts freaking out and runs off to look for it at the bar.
HBBathroom turns to me and says "sike. I have it right here." Then she pulls me into the women's bathroom, strips my pants off and starts going down on me. At this point I have about 5 minutes left to my 1 hour challenge, so I pick her up, finger bang her, and then strip her naked. I bend her over the toilet and we go at it. Simultaneously, I whip out my iPhone and try to take a few money shots, but alas, there was piss poor lighting.
We wrap up and head back out. She buys me a couple more shots and then we exchange information.
--------- Part 2: Stripper Pull
I got into the cab feeling pretty satisfied. I plowed through some fucked up logistics and got my first ever bathroom pull. But, I wasn't going to rest on my laurels and the night was still young (3:00 AM) so I told the driver to drive me to the after hours club. All the strippers and hired guns go to this club once they get off shift, so I was looking forward to a good night.
I show up at the club solo in a post-sex glow. I could still smell the first girl on me. I look around to see if I could make any automatic wings. Most of the guys are rolling through in groups and they look like the bottle-buying type. I move on into the club and its this cavernous underground bar with four separate rooms. At this point, I'm in a pretty low state, since having sex kills my sarge drive for at least 24 hours.
I tell myself, fuck it, KOP: "keep on plowing." The club is packed with HB9s and HB10s. I can obviously tell that most of the girls are locals and most of them are strippers and hired guns. Girls are walking around in their work outfits, wearing bikinis and cut off shorts and ripped tank tops. Titties everywhere. I befriend a few sets and run indirect game for a while. I don't get blown out, but I'm also not deeply hooking any one set. I realize that I needed to run some HB10/ADD Party Girl game. I scan the bar and find my target – HBStripper.
I run my Balls to the Walls (BTW) Direct Opener and I see her instantly hook. I tease her a little then dominate the frame. I run my standard High Value Dancing routine and pull her on to the dance floor. At this point she breaks out her stripper moves. She pulls me onto a sofa and gives me a lap dance. She then pulls me back onto the dance floor and we become the center of attention. The entire room is looking at us grinding the shit out of each other. I pull out my head rush kino pull and my Sexual EC Routine. She's loving it.
I stop and control myself and reenter my Abundance Routine. She tries to pull me back into her and tries to qualify herself again through dancing. I don't bite. We pull away to the bar and she starts trying to kiss me. I dodge the kisses and pull away. We banter for a little bit and she starts grinding on me again. What an ADD stripper.
Now, what happens next I think, is key to the interaction. I know at this point she physically wants to sleep with me, but she isn't emotionally sure, so she starts testing me. She starts grinding on another guy who's sitting down in front of us. I sit back and watch and then open up a girl next to me. The stripper gets jealous and comes back to cockblock. I reshift my attention on her and then she tells me "I have to go for a second."
I stop and think to myself – if I let her leave, I may not see her again, since we're in the VIP section and its hard to get back in. But, if I don't let her go, I lose my frame and my dominance. So, I shrug and push her off. She leaves. I open up a few other sets and now due to my high social proof, girls are hooking much more easily. I get bored and realize none of the girls are as hot as HBStripper so after a half hour I eject. I find HBStripper near the exit talking to one of her guy friends. He's a rich chode, probably a customer, and has his hands all over her. I walk up to her, turn her around, and start making out with her. The chode just stands there with his dick in his hands.
I pull away first. HBStripper comes up for air and asks "What's that for?" I say, "that's for making me wait. Do it again and I'm going to spank you." (Spank) *credit to BradP.
I lean back against the bar and re-enter my non-needy frame. She starts grinding on me and she shares her drink with me. I'm getting bored and its now getting close to 6 am, so I run my ejection routine. HBStripper stares into my eyes for any incongruence and then gives me verbal LMR.
"Irrelevant." (Credit: Jeffy) "Let's Go."
We get her coat and exit the club. The sun is rising as we're making out in the back seat of the taxi. Déjà vu. We show up at our hotel and there's no LMR, since I already took care of it at the club. She really blew my mind. Well that, and some other parts of my body. Here are assorted pictures from my adventures:
Download the Audio Lay Report with Commentery's by Asian Playboy: http://www.abcofattraction.com/media/audio/saffrondoublelr.mp3
and visit Saffron's personal blog:
Friday, April 24, 2009
The 4 Fastest Ways to Turn Her Off - by Doc Holliday
I read this every time I go out its my personal cheat sheet when I dont know what to do..either be an asshole or cool...
Hey man,
A lot is always said about what to do to turn a girl ON, but how do you know when you're turning her off? We compiled this short little list so you know when you're doing something wrong as well as when you do it right.
Ask yourself, are you doing any of these four things?
THE FOUR TOP TURNOFFS
(1) BEING TOO NICE
Being nice is... well... nice, but being TOO NICE will only convince her you are needy, desperate, lonely, unconfident, timid, have low self-esteem, and possibly are just trying to manipulate her by only telling her what she wants to hear. You will neither win the love and respect of women, nor an invitation into their bedroom, by being Mr. Nice Guy.
She must be more emotionally committed than you at all times. This means never do anything needy or self-sacrificing. For example: don't call her too much, don't lavish her with gifts, don't be the first to bring up your feelings or talk about commitment. Just relax and exude the idea that she's trying to win you over, no matter how much you like her.
(2) BEING TOO EASY
Similar to the first one, way too many dudes don't make a girl EARN their attention and affection. If a woman does not have to earn your love and respect, but you just give it away for nothing, she will view it as valueless. Why else would it be free? If you are a desirable guy that is in demand with the ladies, then your adoration and devotion will not come cheap.
Another way of understanding this concept: people do not value anything that is free or very cheap. They waste it or take it for granted. Modern marketing has conditioned people to base quality on price.
So what does that mean for you? Be expensive! Don't come free or easy.
(3) BEING TOO PREDICTABLE
Girls need excitement to stir up their emotions. For most people, both men and women, their love life is their primary (if not only) source of excitement, adventure, and passion. It is not their friends, their work, or their hobbies.
Stop being so conservative and predictable, acting the same way as any other guy, saying the same things, taking them to the same places, and generally just being another guy in her phone book. Surprise her, startle her, confuse her, perhaps even occasionally offend her, but in a fun and playful style.
If you do the same thing every other guy has done, she'll treat you the same way she treated all of the other guys: by not calling you back.
4) BEING TOO INSENSITIVE
This is a warning! Way too many men read about being too nice, easy, and predictable then take it to a destructive extreme. They become an arrogant, cruel ass that treats women like dirt. Sure, women do not like "nice guys", but they like “assholes” even less. If you're going to be a jerk, you need to be a love-able jerk.
Although you may be a troublemaker with funny practical jokes and pursuit of shallow pleasures; ultimately, be a decent human being. This is true of all “bad boys” you will find on television, the big screen, or in a romance novel. They are rough on the surface, but a diamond hidden just beneath. If you convince women that you are crap all the way to your core, they will value you as such.
Hey man,
A lot is always said about what to do to turn a girl ON, but how do you know when you're turning her off? We compiled this short little list so you know when you're doing something wrong as well as when you do it right.
Ask yourself, are you doing any of these four things?
THE FOUR TOP TURNOFFS
(1) BEING TOO NICE
Being nice is... well... nice, but being TOO NICE will only convince her you are needy, desperate, lonely, unconfident, timid, have low self-esteem, and possibly are just trying to manipulate her by only telling her what she wants to hear. You will neither win the love and respect of women, nor an invitation into their bedroom, by being Mr. Nice Guy.
She must be more emotionally committed than you at all times. This means never do anything needy or self-sacrificing. For example: don't call her too much, don't lavish her with gifts, don't be the first to bring up your feelings or talk about commitment. Just relax and exude the idea that she's trying to win you over, no matter how much you like her.
(2) BEING TOO EASY
Similar to the first one, way too many dudes don't make a girl EARN their attention and affection. If a woman does not have to earn your love and respect, but you just give it away for nothing, she will view it as valueless. Why else would it be free? If you are a desirable guy that is in demand with the ladies, then your adoration and devotion will not come cheap.
Another way of understanding this concept: people do not value anything that is free or very cheap. They waste it or take it for granted. Modern marketing has conditioned people to base quality on price.
So what does that mean for you? Be expensive! Don't come free or easy.
(3) BEING TOO PREDICTABLE
Girls need excitement to stir up their emotions. For most people, both men and women, their love life is their primary (if not only) source of excitement, adventure, and passion. It is not their friends, their work, or their hobbies.
Stop being so conservative and predictable, acting the same way as any other guy, saying the same things, taking them to the same places, and generally just being another guy in her phone book. Surprise her, startle her, confuse her, perhaps even occasionally offend her, but in a fun and playful style.
If you do the same thing every other guy has done, she'll treat you the same way she treated all of the other guys: by not calling you back.
4) BEING TOO INSENSITIVE
This is a warning! Way too many men read about being too nice, easy, and predictable then take it to a destructive extreme. They become an arrogant, cruel ass that treats women like dirt. Sure, women do not like "nice guys", but they like “assholes” even less. If you're going to be a jerk, you need to be a love-able jerk.
Although you may be a troublemaker with funny practical jokes and pursuit of shallow pleasures; ultimately, be a decent human being. This is true of all “bad boys” you will find on television, the big screen, or in a romance novel. They are rough on the surface, but a diamond hidden just beneath. If you convince women that you are crap all the way to your core, they will value you as such.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Day Game review infield in nyc - Direct vs Indirect
Hey I like doing daygame alot I get talkative I walk use bodylanguage to know what opener to use ...
First when I started I go out and kick myself for not appraoching and take it hard..
Im very analytical but when infield I just go for it,then it comes to me...
I learned from Doc Holliday early in this before he retired to go direct ....
I had the chance of meeting this guy who goes by AWAKEN ,
he is here in nyc....
His style is more different and somethings I havent had the guts to do he does and gets away with it ...kind of wygant- janka style but more touching. He is SICK that he does subway PU's that I almost piss in my pants when he had a british woman kept moving the convo therefore it was like she was gaming him....shit like that is what makes nyc fabulous.
I started with indirect in daygame got alot of numbers alot of flakes and I use it when they are moving targets or they are near me and I just aks them based on situational...
It depends street,supermarket,etc... you have to think on your feet and sometimes it doesnt go anywhere...
that's the down side
Direct is like Doc describes better but not alot of women react to it.....
Im not sure if its low sexual self esteem when you hit direct on a 6 or 7 HB....
I hit one that from the back was blonde big boobs I went direct and did eyecontact with a light smile
(Ala Saffron, that fucker lol)
She didnt know what the fuck to do I carried the convo and was sweedish but said she was in a hurry and walked away...no number close .
anyways I dont overthink infield so I opened a another one when I saw pizza for a buck frozen section and she was near .
I asked her if they were good she said she didnt know
I told her they look like there good and that accent from jesrsey she said upstate , I said cool :)
Im in residency here so Im not to familiar with the area she asked me where and if I was a nurse
I said "you silly I should hit you with this pizza upside your head goofball"
(playfuly delivered she laughed)
Her: "aha Im taking my lawyer test ,,,"
we kept talking and she walked away....
I re entered and was comfortable and friendly and did the mehow reverse number close since it was ninjaesque....
She said I was funny and I shoould have said that she liked it but I said that you you are fun too...
ALWAYSS GIVE VALUE and REWARD HER FOR COMPLYING
then she said she had a BF I said "thats cool we are just socializing gettin to know each other :)"
she was very attractive..
OK you read this and you will see the pros and cons based on infield you decide what to use.
I use indirect for warmups after my 3rd set I go Direct cause Im in talkative state and it flows easier after the energy power of delivery of DIRECT it becomes a regular convo but we both know its cause Im attracted to her.....
The problem with daygame is TIME CONSTRAINT! I couldnt pull out the nlp "poem of glory"
ala valentines day...LOL!
sandro
First when I started I go out and kick myself for not appraoching and take it hard..
Im very analytical but when infield I just go for it,then it comes to me...
I learned from Doc Holliday early in this before he retired to go direct ....
I had the chance of meeting this guy who goes by AWAKEN ,
he is here in nyc....
His style is more different and somethings I havent had the guts to do he does and gets away with it ...kind of wygant- janka style but more touching. He is SICK that he does subway PU's that I almost piss in my pants when he had a british woman kept moving the convo therefore it was like she was gaming him....shit like that is what makes nyc fabulous.
I started with indirect in daygame got alot of numbers alot of flakes and I use it when they are moving targets or they are near me and I just aks them based on situational...
It depends street,supermarket,etc... you have to think on your feet and sometimes it doesnt go anywhere...
that's the down side
Direct is like Doc describes better but not alot of women react to it.....
Im not sure if its low sexual self esteem when you hit direct on a 6 or 7 HB....
I hit one that from the back was blonde big boobs I went direct and did eyecontact with a light smile
(Ala Saffron, that fucker lol)
She didnt know what the fuck to do I carried the convo and was sweedish but said she was in a hurry and walked away...no number close .
anyways I dont overthink infield so I opened a another one when I saw pizza for a buck frozen section and she was near .
I asked her if they were good she said she didnt know
I told her they look like there good and that accent from jesrsey she said upstate , I said cool :)
Im in residency here so Im not to familiar with the area she asked me where and if I was a nurse
I said "you silly I should hit you with this pizza upside your head goofball"
(playfuly delivered she laughed)
Her: "aha Im taking my lawyer test ,,,"
we kept talking and she walked away....
I re entered and was comfortable and friendly and did the mehow reverse number close since it was ninjaesque....
She said I was funny and I shoould have said that she liked it but I said that you you are fun too...
ALWAYSS GIVE VALUE and REWARD HER FOR COMPLYING
then she said she had a BF I said "thats cool we are just socializing gettin to know each other :)"
she was very attractive..
OK you read this and you will see the pros and cons based on infield you decide what to use.
I use indirect for warmups after my 3rd set I go Direct cause Im in talkative state and it flows easier after the energy power of delivery of DIRECT it becomes a regular convo but we both know its cause Im attracted to her.....
The problem with daygame is TIME CONSTRAINT! I couldnt pull out the nlp "poem of glory"
ala valentines day...LOL!
sandro
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Structure of my Game plan in terms of SNL sticking points
OK, Ive been out practicing,
I kind of suck on dates but thats in the works...
I have prepared my structured for my date or D2's :
which includes sharing a "chick crack pinkberry" near my apt.
I role the idea of male female polarity roles, I feel that solidifys thats it isnt LJBF type of thing.
I want to push myself to limits out of comfort zone in terms of:
-Logistics-ask questions
-Frame Control while in set or prevent losing the set
-Damage control and plowing
Closing was a huge problem...
Im sexual person and known infield as aggresive Im not shy about my sexuality and like to be dominant...its just who I am. I get dirty talked by the girl in the venue...I try to go for the PULL!
but by reviewing notes and talking to my instructors that know me and seen me infield...
I was missing an important piece...
THIS IS WHAT I WOULD DO REGULARLY IN SNL VENUES:
1) frame ladder for a makeout make a male female dynamic to create the moment-
2)I go for a makeout , get it and try to pull after wards ASAP,
3)I would escalate aggressive and physically arouse her IN THE VENUE...
4)I didnt isolate properly, seeded the bounce and couldnt handle damage control or contingencies within 20 minute mark.
5)I would tell her let's get out of here or go xyz place ... she say yes but wouldnt comply to actually go.
6) I would see her surrounde by chodes trying to pull her, and I would get into spectator mode seeing her get pull by a chode, actually I ve seen girls pull drunk guys...
I dont know how you guys have experienced seeing that or it isnt a big deal
but after SNL course I started seeing this happend everytime I go to my SNL venues....
I dont have a wing so I solo sarge...I feel like early version of CJ like how he described how he couldnt get a wing but ...He got Better learning by himself.
Im following that concept....
7)I wouldnt open properly in that scenario where the girl is hittin on guys..I would be scared to come off too eager or needy...
8) I cant talk or keep convo for more than 30 minutes, I get her aroused or I get blown out.
9)Im abit too rough when its pull time, I have to finnese it....like CJ ,Sinn and others do,
to make her feel like she is in control eventhough Im escalating...
Being sexual dominant is something I let my inner man come out, or my sexual aggresor.
Always Be Closing !
RESULT :
I would get LMR up the ass!
Wouldnt want to bounce she knew we were going to have sex she was afriad look like a SLUT...
I freeze out for a while then re initate to bounce...I lose her ..
"buyers remorse" next day ..no date, no response
NEW PLAN:
my next step is teasing the girl, give mixed signals whether she has me or not ...sexually tease her.
-Tease for a kiss then do takeaways.... give her a little and take it away...
I got physical shit test by a girlwhen I went out with Saffron I opened group set and she lost interest because I didnt make out with her she then was gaming bartender...
she was a swedish girl in town for a couple of days.
-once I got her turned on I have to s l o w d o w n..... make her want it.
-know how to manage AMOGs and orbiters....I get AMOG alot due to my weight issues some drunk guy always come in and try to make fun of me in front of the girl...I ignore
-plausible deniability: Review this and read LR's
-qualify more and frame her
-Girl being gamed by chodes- I tried this once when the girl was geting ready to leave with a goodlooking chode and I went direct on her, did kino routine qualified her and she kept askign me who I was where did I come from and if I came regularly... I FUCKIN froze, the guy got jealous and she was by herself I gamed other women to create more attraction jealously plotline and the chode kept chasing throughtout the venue as "the guy hitin on all the girls"...
Other stuff to improve overall:
BE more funny ...
Correct deeper voice and talk slower...
Im going to Philly for 2 days and will go to SNL places there.. : )
Wednesday will work whole day in brooklyn then go to SNL venue afterwards
Thursday school ,gym, dance class, martial arts--maybe set a date from online game or Day game w a personal trainer lady I met : ) ...I need more pics for online game!
or College bar night game..hmmm I havent done that in awhile.
Friday -weekend : PRACTICE !
things do tend to change but we will see....
any suggestions?
sandro
note: I will try to post my 1 st SDL at the same day almost had a SNL , my "mojo" was on point...
SDL I had 2 weeks ago 15 minutes meeting her , texting her calling her right after 2 minutes of talking about meet up for a drink, then takeaway of being busy...eliciting for phone sex and meeting now.
I'm terrible at explaining and did alot of bodylanguage since I knew she was horny on the phone. I dont talk alot...Its a bit explicit..haha..Doc holliday read it and called me a sick fuck..the things I can do with a dildo.....she contacted me later that she liked it and wanted to see me soon...
This without being needy....
I kind of suck on dates but thats in the works...
I have prepared my structured for my date or D2's :
which includes sharing a "chick crack pinkberry" near my apt.
I role the idea of male female polarity roles, I feel that solidifys thats it isnt LJBF type of thing.
I want to push myself to limits out of comfort zone in terms of:
-Logistics-ask questions
-Frame Control while in set or prevent losing the set
-Damage control and plowing
Closing was a huge problem...
Im sexual person and known infield as aggresive Im not shy about my sexuality and like to be dominant...its just who I am. I get dirty talked by the girl in the venue...I try to go for the PULL!
but by reviewing notes and talking to my instructors that know me and seen me infield...
I was missing an important piece...
THIS IS WHAT I WOULD DO REGULARLY IN SNL VENUES:
1) frame ladder for a makeout make a male female dynamic to create the moment-
2)I go for a makeout , get it and try to pull after wards ASAP,
3)I would escalate aggressive and physically arouse her IN THE VENUE...
4)I didnt isolate properly, seeded the bounce and couldnt handle damage control or contingencies within 20 minute mark.
5)I would tell her let's get out of here or go xyz place ... she say yes but wouldnt comply to actually go.
6) I would see her surrounde by chodes trying to pull her, and I would get into spectator mode seeing her get pull by a chode, actually I ve seen girls pull drunk guys...
I dont know how you guys have experienced seeing that or it isnt a big deal
but after SNL course I started seeing this happend everytime I go to my SNL venues....
I dont have a wing so I solo sarge...I feel like early version of CJ like how he described how he couldnt get a wing but ...He got Better learning by himself.
Im following that concept....
7)I wouldnt open properly in that scenario where the girl is hittin on guys..I would be scared to come off too eager or needy...
8) I cant talk or keep convo for more than 30 minutes, I get her aroused or I get blown out.
9)Im abit too rough when its pull time, I have to finnese it....like CJ ,Sinn and others do,
to make her feel like she is in control eventhough Im escalating...
Being sexual dominant is something I let my inner man come out, or my sexual aggresor.
Always Be Closing !
RESULT :
I would get LMR up the ass!
Wouldnt want to bounce she knew we were going to have sex she was afriad look like a SLUT...
I freeze out for a while then re initate to bounce...I lose her ..
"buyers remorse" next day ..no date, no response
NEW PLAN:
my next step is teasing the girl, give mixed signals whether she has me or not ...sexually tease her.
-Tease for a kiss then do takeaways.... give her a little and take it away...
I got physical shit test by a girlwhen I went out with Saffron I opened group set and she lost interest because I didnt make out with her she then was gaming bartender...
she was a swedish girl in town for a couple of days.
-once I got her turned on I have to s l o w d o w n..... make her want it.
-know how to manage AMOGs and orbiters....I get AMOG alot due to my weight issues some drunk guy always come in and try to make fun of me in front of the girl...I ignore
-plausible deniability: Review this and read LR's
-qualify more and frame her
-Girl being gamed by chodes- I tried this once when the girl was geting ready to leave with a goodlooking chode and I went direct on her, did kino routine qualified her and she kept askign me who I was where did I come from and if I came regularly... I FUCKIN froze, the guy got jealous and she was by herself I gamed other women to create more attraction jealously plotline and the chode kept chasing throughtout the venue as "the guy hitin on all the girls"...
Other stuff to improve overall:
BE more funny ...
Correct deeper voice and talk slower...
Im going to Philly for 2 days and will go to SNL places there.. : )
Wednesday will work whole day in brooklyn then go to SNL venue afterwards
Thursday school ,gym, dance class, martial arts--maybe set a date from online game or Day game w a personal trainer lady I met : ) ...I need more pics for online game!
or College bar night game..hmmm I havent done that in awhile.
Friday -weekend : PRACTICE !
things do tend to change but we will see....
any suggestions?
sandro
note: I will try to post my 1 st SDL at the same day almost had a SNL , my "mojo" was on point...
SDL I had 2 weeks ago 15 minutes meeting her , texting her calling her right after 2 minutes of talking about meet up for a drink, then takeaway of being busy...eliciting for phone sex and meeting now.
I'm terrible at explaining and did alot of bodylanguage since I knew she was horny on the phone. I dont talk alot...Its a bit explicit..haha..Doc holliday read it and called me a sick fuck..the things I can do with a dildo.....she contacted me later that she liked it and wanted to see me soon...
This without being needy....
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Doc Holliday!
Dude!
doc holiday!
I'm glad to have him as a friend and guys like him coaching...check his BLOG out !
We were talking and shooting the shit...cool guy,knowledgable and great coach.
check out their bootcamps...I took one awhile back!
over-n-out
doc holiday!
I'm glad to have him as a friend and guys like him coaching...check his BLOG out !
We were talking and shooting the shit...cool guy,knowledgable and great coach.
check out their bootcamps...I took one awhile back!
over-n-out
Monday, January 26, 2009
New Year in Full gear!
I'm happy for 2009, it will be a hell of a ride for sure... and its up to you to make it worth while. Its YOUR responsibility to make yourself happy...here are my goals and stuff I want to do
NO EXCUSES!!!
1)Perfecting the PU skill- Perfect practice makes perfect, I will push myself to limits to get better.Dedicate more time infield than reading.Some of the best PU instructors out there suggest this mindset of learning by being more time infield then coming back to learn by timing it ,reading up and going back out there .Ive been helped by some of the BEST in the world and some I consider them good mentor and friend. Combination of being FUN, Social and Dominant!
I like reading rejection article by Entropy, everytime I come home after shitty night, I feel I'm making progress.
2) GYM and Martial Arts - I'm overweight cat and Ive been in the GYM and I want to take on MMA as a new hobby.As my physical traits looks better identifying with a rough rugged look with sharp suaveness...its sick! Entropy's Post motivated to building my "passive value" game and most importantly my well being.
3)Comedy and Improv- I was shy kid but always made people laugh, one of my patients that works with a famous comedian told me I should give it a shot, so its definitely in this list to develop my natural ability to be funny in the right moments,not taking anything seriously...
Guys like Eltopo and Practical PU instructor Doc Holliday are always in rhythm,the excersize in the bc made me realize the importance of this is magical.
4)Dance class-Luckily Im in school finishing residency so I will definitely going for that. I tried dance floor without skill but Ive steped on girls which have been disappointed and some turned out to be dance instructors.I credit Saffron which is awesome instructor and in many aspects of developing my ALPHA stereotype for seduction ,including his dance game takes his kino to extreme sexuality. His patented hair pull routine which Ive used in front of my wings have made several ladies turn into bad girls ..some guys have literally stand there with disbelief at what I just did ...
5) Voice and bodylanguage- Ive been practicing vocal exercises and its paying off,I plan to join a choir at church or something ,Ive improved my bodylanguage by 70% in the last month Ive been modeling Benicio del toro and George Clooney.Javier Bardem in Vicky Cristina Barcelona.I see myself becoming that guy that women fantasize,rather than the "doormat friendly" guy
I found an excersize at the gym to carry yourself better with the weights at your side forcing your muscles to adjust to that type of walk and posture.
6)Staying Positve and focused- All my life Ive been distracted, Ive half assed everything other than Dentistry. but I want to incorporate dedication to all I do , cause its for me and I DESERVE BETTER, I DESERVE THE BEST! Inner game or whatever you want to call it isnt complicated,guys like
Tim and his MINDSET ,
El Topo (w/ Jtime and Megatron in his recent phone conference went at it nicely)
CJ's Frame of releasing,
Entropy's concept of perception are what I found useful for me.I dont need 15 dvd's to explain that right?
7)Persuasion and leading - something I noticed that I was lacking from my game.
"How To Be An Expert Persuader... In 20 Days Or Less!" -by Micheal Lee
8)Relationship managements-I had a failed marriage,GF that dumped me right after 8 months I met her 3 days after I took a bc and didnt game after that..became a pathetic loser who stayed in his comfort zone... I never lead the relationship.
Paul Janka points out how after sex, power is reversed and man ALWAYS has to lead, when he doesn't...it falls on him.And loses his control and his mind .AVOID AT ALL COST.
I want a GF but Im into meeting more women to know what I want. Ive been lucky that some that I have met have awesome qualities that guys dreamed of.
My favorite is FUN girl that both of us can't get bored being together.
9)Identity and Lifestyle- I have 6 months left to live in nyc before I finish school.
I want to drive my identity and lifestyle to be awesome...Identity as a fun cool dominant man who is responsible with a dynamic lifestyle to keep himself active and aware socially and his surroundings.
I plan to go out more eat different places,hobbies like flying,sky diving and other crazy shit ! know more about the city... the best reference is Mickey Rourke in 9 1/2 weeks knows his surroundings and can talk about it yet he puts off a dominant and sexual worthy man vibe.I 've seen guys like AWAKEN who is someone who his game seems so effortless.
to sum up : Like Sinn says "Always be cooler than the girl"
10) Always try something new and push yourself : Ive learned the importance of doing new shit everyday...I learn faster that way..the pain lasts short time once you become more consistent.I listen to advice and do it.
some of these seem repetitive but for now I plan to master these within 6 months before heading off to Miami ...
I will post here to keep up with myself that way its more of an experience than just a journal....
sandro
NO EXCUSES!!!
1)Perfecting the PU skill- Perfect practice makes perfect, I will push myself to limits to get better.Dedicate more time infield than reading.Some of the best PU instructors out there suggest this mindset of learning by being more time infield then coming back to learn by timing it ,reading up and going back out there .Ive been helped by some of the BEST in the world and some I consider them good mentor and friend. Combination of being FUN, Social and Dominant!
I like reading rejection article by Entropy, everytime I come home after shitty night, I feel I'm making progress.
2) GYM and Martial Arts - I'm overweight cat and Ive been in the GYM and I want to take on MMA as a new hobby.As my physical traits looks better identifying with a rough rugged look with sharp suaveness...its sick! Entropy's Post motivated to building my "passive value" game and most importantly my well being.
3)Comedy and Improv- I was shy kid but always made people laugh, one of my patients that works with a famous comedian told me I should give it a shot, so its definitely in this list to develop my natural ability to be funny in the right moments,not taking anything seriously...
Guys like Eltopo and Practical PU instructor Doc Holliday are always in rhythm,the excersize in the bc made me realize the importance of this is magical.
4)Dance class-Luckily Im in school finishing residency so I will definitely going for that. I tried dance floor without skill but Ive steped on girls which have been disappointed and some turned out to be dance instructors.I credit Saffron which is awesome instructor and in many aspects of developing my ALPHA stereotype for seduction ,including his dance game takes his kino to extreme sexuality. His patented hair pull routine which Ive used in front of my wings have made several ladies turn into bad girls ..some guys have literally stand there with disbelief at what I just did ...
5) Voice and bodylanguage- Ive been practicing vocal exercises and its paying off,I plan to join a choir at church or something ,Ive improved my bodylanguage by 70% in the last month Ive been modeling Benicio del toro and George Clooney.Javier Bardem in Vicky Cristina Barcelona.I see myself becoming that guy that women fantasize,rather than the "doormat friendly" guy
I found an excersize at the gym to carry yourself better with the weights at your side forcing your muscles to adjust to that type of walk and posture.
6)Staying Positve and focused- All my life Ive been distracted, Ive half assed everything other than Dentistry. but I want to incorporate dedication to all I do , cause its for me and I DESERVE BETTER, I DESERVE THE BEST! Inner game or whatever you want to call it isnt complicated,guys like
Tim and his MINDSET ,
El Topo (w/ Jtime and Megatron in his recent phone conference went at it nicely)
CJ's Frame of releasing,
Entropy's concept of perception are what I found useful for me.I dont need 15 dvd's to explain that right?
7)Persuasion and leading - something I noticed that I was lacking from my game.
"How To Be An Expert Persuader... In 20 Days Or Less!" -by Micheal Lee
8)Relationship managements-I had a failed marriage,GF that dumped me right after 8 months I met her 3 days after I took a bc and didnt game after that..became a pathetic loser who stayed in his comfort zone... I never lead the relationship.
Paul Janka points out how after sex, power is reversed and man ALWAYS has to lead, when he doesn't...it falls on him.And loses his control and his mind .AVOID AT ALL COST.
I want a GF but Im into meeting more women to know what I want. Ive been lucky that some that I have met have awesome qualities that guys dreamed of.
My favorite is FUN girl that both of us can't get bored being together.
9)Identity and Lifestyle- I have 6 months left to live in nyc before I finish school.
I want to drive my identity and lifestyle to be awesome...Identity as a fun cool dominant man who is responsible with a dynamic lifestyle to keep himself active and aware socially and his surroundings.
I plan to go out more eat different places,hobbies like flying,sky diving and other crazy shit ! know more about the city... the best reference is Mickey Rourke in 9 1/2 weeks knows his surroundings and can talk about it yet he puts off a dominant and sexual worthy man vibe.I 've seen guys like AWAKEN who is someone who his game seems so effortless.
to sum up : Like Sinn says "Always be cooler than the girl"
10) Always try something new and push yourself : Ive learned the importance of doing new shit everyday...I learn faster that way..the pain lasts short time once you become more consistent.I listen to advice and do it.
some of these seem repetitive but for now I plan to master these within 6 months before heading off to Miami ...
I will post here to keep up with myself that way its more of an experience than just a journal....
sandro
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)