Thought I'd share this article
with you from Nick's blog. It is about a recent post at
the Charisma Arts blog. We like Juggler's writing, but
there's a lot left to the imagination in terms of teaching
how to do it. Hope you find this helpful :)
What Juggler Left Out
by Nick Sparks
from www.sparksofattraction.com
If I could make a list of thought leaders in this industry
that have had the most influence on my development, Wayne
“Juggler” Elise is definitely in the top 5. After
beginning my education with The Game, Jugglers style and
vibe were a breath of fresh air that added a entirely new
dimension to my game. Anyone who knows my style knows that
a more developed “Juggler barrier” plays a huge part in
it. Also, the vacuum and statement-of-interest (SOI) were
very innovative when they hit the industry.
If you’ve ever exposed yourself to any of Wayne’s
writing, you know that he relies heavily on typed out
conversations to demonstrate his method. One of the major
drawbacks of this that has been cited is that while the
conversations provide an excellent example of what to say,
the reasons why some of his lines work isn’t always made
perfectly clear.
With that in mind, I decided to take a conversation that
Juggler recently posted for free on his website and break
down everything that’s happening step by step so that you
can better implement his style into your own game. You can
find the original post at their website so you can read it
in its entirety. (I’ve bolded my comments for easier
reading)
You: Excuse me, I can’t help but notice that you are
unsatisfied with your fruitcake-pattern hoodie. I have to
say that I’m surprised but happy for you.
What he does here is notices something interesting in the
environment and makes a humorous comment on it. Of course
you won’t always be in a situation where a beautiful
woman is returning a quirky Christmas gift, but if you pay
more attention to your surroundings, you’ll find a number
of things to comment on. A simple exercise you can do to
develop this capacity is to stop several times a day, look
around, and take note of 5 interesting things in your
surroundings. You should try to look at life through the
lens of a comedian and find humorous interpretations of
these interesting things, or at the very least simply be
able to comment on them in an interesting way. Most guys
have this capacity already even if they don’t realize it.
For example, if you see a girl carrying a suitcase. You can
either say: “So, I see you have a suitcase”… not so
interesting. Or, you can say, “I have to say, I’m
ridiculously jealous of the fact that you’re going on
vacation right now”. More interesting.
After noticing these interesting things share one or two of
your observations with whoever is around you.
The second thing he does is share his personal feelings on
the observation. This subtle move shows that he is
high-status enough that his feelings carry enough value to
be shared and expresses confidence.
Also, notice his opening the convo with a statement rather
than a question. Classic Juggler.
Her: “Ha, hah ha.”
She found this observation extremely funny.
You: “I’ll trade you my Lance Armstrong tire repair
kit. Or better yet, I got some Grandma cookies here
somewhere.”
Juggler continues the initial joke with more humor and
references to himself. This move not only showcases his wit
but also frames both of them as having in common or
something that they can both relate to.
Her: “Oh, I had too many of those lately.”
She responds favorably.
You: “Yeah, I can relate. I like that about you. You and
I are the same. Who would have known. So I’m thinking of
a New Year’s resolution. What’s yours going to be?”
Wayne strengthens the shared frame with his first line and
then follows up with a classic Juggler SOI. The only thing
is that the SOI here seems a bit un-calibrated. A woman
should be complimented after she’s done something to
deserve that compliment. Maybe her body language is
screaming “I want you now” and that SOI would have been
justified, but you really don’t get a sense of that from
the script.
You can actually make something like this work though only
with the correct vocal tonality. I’d probably leave out
the “I like that about you” line but something along
the lines of, “I can totally relate, I feel like you and
I are like, the same person” when said in a very
over-the-top, facetious tone of voice can work, although
this really isn’t explained in the script.
He then breaks the thread and starts a new one with a
somewhat related holiday question.
Her: “To finish law school.”
You: “Oh that’s a good one. I can hire you to sue
grandma for the bad cookies. Seriously though, that’s
cool. I think I would like being a lawyer. I’d feel kinda
powerful. Like yeah, give me a speeding ticket, see what
happens.”
He does a good job here. He first uses a bit of callback
humor to a previous point in the conversation and then
paints a vivid and entertaining picture of what he feels it
would be like to be a lawyer.
The latter half is a great technique that you can work on
if it’s not a part of you repertoire just yet. A simple
exercise is what we call the best/worst exercise. Simply
think of any occupation or other information that a woman
can give you and come up with the best and worst case
scenario of what that would look like and then paint as
vivid of a picture of that as possible.
For example, she says she’s an artist.
Best scenario: Oh, so you must be incredibly creative.
You’ll have to let me know when your next exhibit will be
and I’ll be there to marvel at your genius.
Worst scenario: Oh, so you must spend most of your time
cooped up in a poorly-lit apartment with a bottle of Jack
then. I can see that as being fun.
The more of these you think though and have something for
the more often you’ll have a creative and witty line to
drop on the spot.
Her: “Haha, yeah it is good to know law for practical
reasons. For instance, my professor says…”
You: “Hey, I like you. What are you doing after this?”
In the comment section he clears up the fact that he is not
actually cutting the girl off here, but rather lets her
finish saying whatever she’s saying before responding.
The SOI here is much better calibrated. In her response she
is sharing something more personal about her life and is
contributing a good deal to the conversation. Because
she’s done that he takes advantage of a great time to
reward her for it and escalate the interaction.
Her: “I’m meeting a friend for lunch.”
Burn
You: “Oh too bad, I thought it might be fun to sit down
at the Starbucks over there and chat a bit more for five
minutes. I like talking with you.”
Meh. After the recent SOI and her not reciprocating
anything of the sort I wouldn’t have followed up with
“I like talking to you”. The Starbucks thing is fine in
that it’s confidently stating your intention, although I
would probably go with something like, “That’s too bad,
this is the best return-line conversation I’ve ever had,
we have to continue it sometime”, and expressed nearly
the same thing and added a bit of humor back into it rather
than just the overkill, borderline-desperate SOI.
Her: “Are you hitting on me?”
You: “Maybe I am and maybe I’m not. It all depends on
if you like it or not. And judging by your smile now I
would say, yes I AM hitting on you. Sure that’s the
ticket.”
“Sure, that’s the ticket”: If you have Juggler’s
personality, you can use this all day. If you don’t,
I’d probably stay from this one. Otherwise, the rest of
it is a cute line that I would use anytime.
The line that I actually prefer here though is credited to
Zan Parrion and that response is “Of course I’m hitting
on you”. It’s just a whole other level of Juggler’s
stuff.
Her: “Well, just to warn you I have a black belt in
flirting defense. But yeah, let’s sit down for five
minutes.”
Has anyone actually heard a girl say this?
You: “Excellent. What’s your name by the way?”
Her: “My name is Persimonia”
You: “Nice name. I’m impressed. My name is your name
here. In the language of the old country it means, he who
drinks hot chocolate through a straw.”
Great name exchange and another cute line to finish. You
can steal this one or go for something along the lines of,
“I’m Nick, it’s nice to meet you. Well, we’ve only
got 5 minutes together so we had better take full advantage
of it.
At a high level, Juggler’s only fault in this interaction
is the fact that he is almost “trapped” in his Juggler
method framework and forced to rely too heavily on the SOI
and use it in situations where it wouldn’t be warranted.
Will this work on some girls? Absolutely. Will it creep
other girls out? Absolutely.
Finally, one other point that was never mentioned: In order
to make this or any conversation a successful one, you must
carry great eye contact, body language, and vocal tonality.
If you’re lacking those elements, those ‘ha ha’s from
her will turn into weird looks and polite nodding.
Thank you again to Juggler for the great conversation and
good luck to everyone else using some of this stuff in the
future.
Cheers guys,
Christian
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